


Comatose

by CartoonJessie



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: AU after TLJ, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Hux is in a coma, Rey searches his mind for answers, slowish burn but maybe not?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-01-31 13:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 26,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21446788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CartoonJessie/pseuds/CartoonJessie
Summary: Peace has returned to the galaxy. The First Order is no more.Hux barely survived, and has spent years in an unconscious state, in a bacta tank in a remote hospital, but then Rey comes along. She's ready to dive into his subconscious mind to find a much-coveted code that would help her allies. But is she ready to face the cruelest man in the galaxy, if only in his dreams?
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rey
Comments: 48
Kudos: 119





	1. Chapter 1

Three years of peace had passed quickly. The First Order had been defeated, the Galactic Senate had been reinstated and Jedi were back to being myths.

Not that there were no Jedi left. They just kept a low profile.

Rey was alive, as was Ben, and while they had sometimes discussed what their role was in the Galaxy, Ben hadn’t seemed eager to bring a new group of Jedi together. No matter what argument she’d thrown at him, their opinions had clashed, and it hadn’t been the last time either.

Rey would not deny the attraction she’d felt for him – she remembered the love-drunk glances they’d shared, or the tense sparring sessions they’d had. He was like a live-wire, constantly jolting her awake, but sometimes it was too much. Especially when they discussed politics and the future, he angered her in the same way that she sometimes calmed him, and it was a type of balance Rey did not enjoy.

Their friendship had not developed into romance because Rey had somehow felt it in her gut that despite their deep connection, they’d drive each other absolutely mad if they'd allow themselves to grow closer.

And when they spent time apart, every now and then, their connection through the Force allowed them to see each other, to talk to one another, and to exchange ideas – but they were like polite house calls nowadays, especially if they kept the topic of conversation light.

Rey tried to live by the code of the Jedi – keeping people at a comfortable distance, to focus on the Light Side of the Force, like the Jedi of old had done. It was a safe way to be – and the Force was like a warm blanket on a cold night, even when she felt alone.

She still had her friends among the Resistance, and though throughout the years, she saw them less and less, she’d often still speak with them over the holonet.

It was rather rare that Rose was the one to call. Usually it was Finn that rang, with Rose nearby and joining in on the conversation, but this time Finn was nowhere to be seen.

That night, it wasn’t a social call. Nor did Rose call Rey to just chat to another woman. What she needed was Rey’s technological insights – maybe the old scavenger had some tricks up her sleeve that could help her with her own enigma.

For years, the best technicians of the Resistance had tried hacking into the records they’d retrieved from the First Order. Plenty of records hadn’t been encrypted as heavily and had been uncovered, but when it came to the most technological records, the ones that were rumored to hold all the secrets on projects such as Starkiller Base and the Hyperspace Tracking, no one had managed to get in.

Even Ben had been rather useless. “I was not in charge of technological developments within the First Order,” he had stated. “Only a handful of Generals knew those codes, and they’re all gone. I can’t help.”

Ben was rather brief in those matters. Rey always felt he didn’t want anything else to do with the First Order. It was like a nightmare he was trying to run from, and so everything that brought him back to that, he dismissed quickly.

Rey understood Rose’s plight. The First Order’s technological ingenuity could be used for good as well as bad – it just depended on the people owning that particular knowledge, and how they chose to use it.

But as she listened to Rose ramble on about the ways in which she had tried to crack the code, even going as far as tracking down DJ to ask him for help (which he had agreed to, for a big price), had been in vain. Even the finest master codebreakers had not been able to get the information.

“Maybe it’s not a code you can ever break,” Rey offered gently, though she seemed how that visibly upset Rose, who was frowning stubbornly now. Deciding that she had sounded to defeatist, she asked: “Is there no First Order general left alive who might have known the codes? Someone who we might not realize has the codes and is imprisoned somewhere?”

Rose shook her head. “Several of the imprisoned generals were asked, but they all seemed to agree upon the exact names of those generals who knew it. But those men are mostly dead.”

“Mostly?” Rey repeated, a little amused by the way she’d put that.

“Hux obviously would know the code,” Rose replied, an angry frown on her face. She had no fond memories of the General. “But his mind is in a constant state of vegetation nowadays.”

As she spotted Rey’s confused look, she added: “He has been in a coma since the final battle. The only reason they’re keeping him alive is because they want to put him on trial the moment he would wake again. It’s unlikely to ever happen. And because the Republic does not do executions, not even of the man who destroyed the Hosnian system, he’s just being kept in a coma.”

Rey listened quietly, her mind spinning.

She knew who Hux was, but had never met him. She’d heard of the General who had almost died, but who they had somehow managed to keep alive, but just barely.

“We can’t crack the system,” Rey muttered, lost in thought. “But maybe we can get a glimpse into his mind. Maybe we can crack the code from there.”

Rose was absolutely still as she stared at Rey’s holo.

“Crack… his mind?” she asked after a few moments.

Rey nodded briefly. “Yes. Like a Jedi mind trick. There have been instances where Jedi have read other people’s minds. If I can get into his mind, I might be able to get the code for you. Steal it from the only place where we know it’s stored.”

Rose’s eyes lit up. She’d been trying to get that code for years now, she was not about to discourage Rey if she believed she could do it.

“It would be awesome if that would work!” Rose said eagerly. “How can I help?”

“For starters, I have no idea where they’re keeping him!” Rey admitted. “Where is he?”

Rose wasn’t certain either.

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “But I’ll find out.”

+++

Giddea was the darkest planet Rey had ever been to. Its sun had died many lifetimes ago, but it hadn’t been abandoned completely.

Underneath the surface of the planet, there were various scientific facilities, and in one of those underground structures, there was a ward full of former First Order patients.

Some were comatose, others were unable to survive without the aid of the medical droids that roamed the building. In charge, was an old acquaintance of Rey, someone who had saved Finn’s life after Kylo Ren had slashed his back open.

Doctor Harter Kalonia had only grown grayer over the years, but the way she smiled had remained the same. As she welcomed Rey with open arms, she even gave her a small hug.

Most people didn’t hug her whenever she came to visit, but Rey couldn’t help but smile as she allowed herself to enjoy the brief, but warm touch of the older woman.

“It has been too long,” Doctor Kalonia said. “And I’m grateful for the visit, not many people are interested in coming here. I usually speak to no one but our suppliers.”

“How long have you been here?” Rey wondered.

“Close to fourteen months for me now,” the doctor replied.

“And you’re the only human here?”

“Yes. The droids do most of the work, if I’m being honest. I just need to make sure they all run smoothly.”

As Rey followed the good doctor into the ward, she saw a massive room with dozens of beds, and even more bacta tanks. The lights on the ceiling were dimmed, and it was mostly machinery that was still lit up and allowed Rey to see all the way to the back.

“Our lamps simulate sunlight in here,” doctor Kalonia explained. “But right now it’s evening for them, so it will be dark for another eight hours or so.”

Rey nodded, a little overwhelmed by the amount of patients she saw, and the simultaneous silence.

“Which one is General Hux?”

Doctor Kalonia beckoned her to follow, and led her to a row of bacta tanks. At the very end of it, after passing dozens of men and women, she came to the tank where the General was afloat, wearing nothing but a pair of briefs. His eyes were closed and his skinny torso seemed starved, in a way. Rey even spotted bruises on his stomach.

“Was he recently injured?” she wondered.

Doctor Kalonia shook her head. “No, those are permanent marks. Probably from trauma during his childhood. I wondered the same thing as you do when I first saw him, but no amount of bacta heals that sort of under-skin scarring.”

If Rey didn’t know any better, she’d believe he’d been punched in the gut – but if it was a scar, maybe it had been caused by a far graver injury.

Now that she stood opposite him, she wondered if she’d be able to get into his mind, but she knew she had to try. She’d promised Rose.

Walking closer, she put her hand on the glass of the bacta-tank, and closed her eyes.

Doctor Kalonia didn’t stand far behind her and held her breath, wondering if she’d see any sort of magic next.

But with the Force as her ally, she sensed too much in that moment. She wasn’t certain if she sensed Hux or the dozens of other patients, or perhaps even doctor Kalonia herself. It was like a cacophony of whispers, and she had no idea which one to follow.

As she withdrew her hand again and stepped back, she turned to the doctor.

“Do you have a place where it’s more isolated? Where there are no humans and I could try again?”

The doctor nodded. “Follow me.”

A few minutes later, they’d entered a long corridor, with operating rooms all throughout, but none were in use. As Kalonia showed Rey the rooms, Rey decided: “I want the last one in this hallway. It should be easiest to meditate there.”

Doctor Kalonia nodded, but curiously asked: “You’ll be able to read his mind then?”

“I hope so. I have to try.”

+++

While droids cleaned up the General and transported him, Rey drank some tea in Doctor Kalonia’s living quarters. Compared to the rest of the ward, her quarters felt like a home of sorts. Kalonia kept some plants, many books, and had a lovely brown sofa on which they could relax. The walls weren’t painted in a pristine white, but in a dark green color, and there were carpets on the floor which made it all a more relaxing space.

“Do you go up to the surface a lot?” Rey wondered.

“No,” Kalonia replied. “There’s nothing there. No light, no life, and hardly enough air or warmth to survive.”

“There’s nowhere nearby you sometimes go?”

“Giddea isn’t known for its bars or nightlife,” the doctor replied dryly, before she raised an eyebrow. “Why? Are you pitying me?”

“Maybe a little bit,” Rey admitted. “Your home is lovely, but it reminds me of when I used to live on Jakku. It was lonely.”

Another warm smile assured Rey that she hadn’t said anything wrong, and when a droid entered, Rey put down her empty cup of tea to follow it. Doctor Kalonia had gotten up as well, but Rey shook her head.

“I will manage. Thank you for the tea, doctor. I will look for you when I’m done.”

+++

As Rey entered the cold operating room, she took a deep breath. To her shock, she found the former general on top of the operating table, just clad in white shorts, but completely bare besides that. Even from the doorway, she imagined she could count his ribs.

Frowning, she walked closer and touched his pale forearm. He was freezing, and Rey shook her head in disapproval.

Maybe the droids had done everything Doctor Kalonia had asked, but they obviously had not accounted for the fact that these rooms were far colder than the main hall. He had to be uncomfortable, and so Rey went back into the hallway, checking all lockers and cabinets until she found some blankets.

With no less than three blankets in her arms, she returned to Hux and started covering him up. The last thing she wanted was for him to get sick and die before she’d even retrieved the information Rose had asked for. When she was done, she stood by his side and looked at his face.

Even in a coma, he looked strict, almost as though he had a permanent frown on his forehead, but his hair was different than she remembered seeing in images. There was no hair gel holding it in place, and it looked a tiny bit longer than it had been before. Maybe they trimmed his hair every now and then, but not recently.

It also seemed a little wet still, probably from the bacta tank, and as she ran her fingers through it for a brief moment, she felt how it was quite damp still. She suddenly withdrew her hand, as though she realized what she was doing was wrong, and licked her lip as she glanced at anything but the unconscious man before her.

Standing by his side, Rey took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she sensed the Force in the room, and found only him. His presence was like the softest hum in a peaceful forest, but he was there alright.

She brought her hand underneath the blanket and touched his forearm again, just to be closer to him and to read him more easily. She was about to dive into his subconscious, to the part of his mind where dreams were made, and reminded herself what she needed: access codes to the First Order files that required the highest clearance.

How hard could it be?

+++

She remembered the way she had entered Kylo’s mind, all those years ago, when her powers had been so new to her. This time, she knew her value, and she didn’t hesitate as she inserted herself into Hux’s mind.

But it was chaotic – almost as chaotic as when she’d had her first vision upon touching Luke’s lightsaber.

She was on the bridge of a First Order Star Destroyer, hardly able to keep her balance as the floor shook beneath her feet, and for a moment she was distraught by the violence she saw.

All around her were dead bodies of officers and cadets, injured by explosions and gunfire, with loud sirens wailing across the bridge, assaulting her ears.

Only one man was left standing near a console to the side of the bridge, his ginger hair slick and combed back and his uniform making him appear much wider than Rey had seen him to be.

He hadn’t noticed her yet, and was tapping furiously on the console, until the sirens stopped and he frantically shouted a message into the console. He was losing it.

“This is Commander Hux of the First Order. We are under attack – I repeat – we are…”

He was unable to finish the sentence. Rey could hear X-Wings race by and felt proton torpedoes shake their surroundings.

Hux held onto the console, but ducked away suddenly when it exploded. Rey got thrown back unexpectedly, and by the time she opened her eyes again, they were somewhere else.

Another bridge. This time no one was dead or bleeding, yet, but a large holo of Snoke suddenly appeared in the middle of the bridge.

“General Hux!” he shouted disdainfully, and Rey witnessed how Hux got thrown to the floor. “You have disappointed me most gravely.”

“Please, Supreme Leader,” he groveled, but Snoke would hear none of it.

“You are incompetent. I should have left the task up to Kylo Ren – he is far more capable than you ever were.”

Rey noticed how the other officers on the bridge seemed to be laughing. Though it was a quiet laughter, it was loud enough for Hux to hear, and as he tried to crawl up again, it seemed like the Force pushed him down, like Snoke was using him as a rag doll.

Rey didn’t enjoy seeing Snoke again. She’d had one encounter with him, and that had been enough. She had been spared his sight since then, but he looked especially ghastly and ugly in Hux’s mind.

She started walking towards Hux. She had to tell him he was dreaming, so that he could find his bearings and regain control of what was happening. She took two steps, but the next, his mind had jumped again, and Rey saw another ghost.

Not literally a ghost, but someone she knew to be dead. Captain Phasma was standing opposite Hux.

“It’s done,” she announced solemnly.

“Good,” Hux said, apparently pleased. “Has the beetle done its work?”

“It has,” she replied, handing him a small bottle.

As Hux looked at it, he paled.

“It’s empty!” he panicked.

Phasma seemed unbothered by that. “Yes, it is.”

“The beetle, where is it?” He’d begun trembling and looked around frantically, and Phasma disappeared into thin air. She was gone, and Rey suddenly noticed hundreds of beetles crawling all over the floor, heading towards Hux as he screamed in horror.

Chills ran down her spine, and though she wasn’t certain what these beetles did, it was clear that Hux was terrified of them. No doubt about it that they caused some sort of pain, or worse, death.

They covered all of him, and it was a very disturbing sight which she could not save him from.

She was engulfed by darkness the same moment he was engulfed by the beetles, and the next moment she found herself standing in the desert, the heat so familiar that she could not help but look towards the sun.

“Jakku,” she whispered, wondering how of all planets, this was where Hux had come. Or was it her own doing?

As she looked around, she saw him as a child, with several other children that all seemed to be older and stronger than him. He took the lead as he led them through the desert, and they all followed him as he shouted order after order, his voice trembling.

“He’s weak!” one of the kids cried out, and the next moment, the others laughed.

“Why should we follow you?” another kid asked.

Hux turned around to address them, but he was trembling and afraid to speak up, and one of the kids slapped him in the face. It didn’t look painful, just degrading.

The others all walked over to him and pushed him around, as he cried for them to stop.

Rey had seen enough. She knew that if she waited much longer, it would only get worse, and then they’d jump again. She needed to get through to him.

“Stop it!” she cried out, demanding respect from the children, and it seemed it worked, for they all stepped back.

Little Hux looked at Rey with wide eyes, and the other children vanished like smoke.

As Rey walked closer to him, she knelt before him so she was at eye level with him.

“My name is Rey,” she said. “I’m from Jakku as well. I’m here to help you.”

He seemed confused more than anything, and didn’t even reply to her – maybe his subconscious was still trying to process it.

“You’re the Jedi girl,” he suddenly said, and Rey immediately nodded.

“I am. But I’m not your enemy,” she assured him with a brave smile. “And you’re not a child – do you remember? You’re a General in the First Order.”

As he seemed to become aware of that, he blinked a few times, and Rey saw how he shifted into his adult form, wearing his uniform, sitting on his knees in the sand, so he was at eye level with her while she had knelt down before him.

“I heard tales of you,” he said, his mind a galaxy away. “But I never saw you.” His dazed expression slowly changed into a more alert one. As he looked at her, he seemed intrigued. He was drinking in the sight of her, and Rey was a little self-conscious. She tried not to blush.

“Are you aware you’re dreaming?” she asked slowly, looking at him empathically.

He looked away from her eyes, to his hands as he gently moved his fingers, and Rey was aware how the background seemed to disappear for a brief moment. The hot Jakku desert changed into nothing – into a black void – before it shifted into the bridge of a Star Destroyer again, then back into nothing, then into personal quarters. He was frowning now, closing his eyes a few times.

“If I’m dreaming, why can’t I wake up?” he demanded to know, his voice strained and stressed, before he suddenly grabbed a firm hold of her arms, squeezing them so she could not escape. “How are you doing this?!”

She saw anger building, and she could feel in the Force that this wasn’t good – that he was furious and blaming her. Terrified of what he would be able to do in this dream world, and afraid she was ill-prepared for this confrontation, she severed the link between them, but he was holding on to her so tightly that she literally had to jump up and pull herself physically away from him.

When she came to, she was lying on the floor in the operating room, Hux’s arm no longer resting on the operating table, but dangling over the edge.

Rey was gasping for air, her chest heaving quickly as she tried to come to grips with the fact that she was no longer in his mind. This was the real world. She was in Giddea. Doctor Kalonia was waiting for her in her own room.

Her optimism of before had sunk to the pit of her stomach. It would not be easy getting the codes from Hux. And she had no idea how to go about it anymore.

Maybe some meditation would help.

And maybe it wasn’t a bad idea if she told doctor Kalonia that she would be staying a while longer.

+++

The doctor had been nothing but accommodating as she had explained she would need a while longer with Hux. While droids had moved Hux back to the bacta tank, she’d moved into one of the operating rooms. It was a terribly cold room, and Rey had a blanket around her as she tried to clear her mind so she could meditate.

It had been a long time since she’d felt as much inner turmoil, and it only took her a few deep breaths before she heard a familiar voice.

“I haven’t felt you as distraught in years,” a deep voice said.

As Rey opened her eyes and saw Ben standing across from her, she raised an eyebrow.

“That obvious, huh?”

He seemed amused as he put his hands casually in his pockets. Rey looked at him, for a brief moment reminded of Han. Though Ben still preferred to wear dark colors, it looked like something Han would have worn as well. It was a very casual look, for the man who had once ruled the First Order.

“So what’s going on?” he asked curiously.

Rey had wanted to meditate instead. She knew Ben wasn’t waiting for any reminders of the First Order, but maybe that was the best way to get rid of him as well.

She wasn’t going to beat around the bush.

“I’m trying to read General Hux’s mind so I can steal some uncrackable security codes from him.”

Ben seemed surprised.

“Ah.” He frowned, not sure where to begin.

“What can you tell me about him?” she asked. “What do you know of him?”

Ben looked away. “We weren’t exactly friends.”

He seemed to want to keep it at that – deflecting, as he did at any mention of his former allies.

“Ben.”

He looked up again at the mention of his name.

“Please, help me,” she asked kindly. “Anything you know about him. About his past, his personality, his friends and enemies.”

Ben shrugged. “He didn’t really have friends. Phasma seemed to tolerate him better than most. He was hated among the older First Order generals. But apparently he was brilliant – technologically. A perfectionist. Thorough. Ruthless. Heartless. I think that’s why Snoke kept him around. Starkiller Base was his pet project for a long while. But everyone knew not to trust him. He wanted to be Supreme Leader and would kill to get the title. Snoke wasn’t threatened though. I guess he was using Hux for his brilliant mind – I can’t really imagine why else he would tolerate such a backstabber.”

“Were you friends, in some way?” Rey asked, and Ben raised an eyebrow.

“Yes,” he replied dryly. “If by friends you mean: ‘Did you want to kill each other?’ – because we both had a very strong desire to inflict harm upon the other. Just you mentioning him makes me want to go smash something.”

Rey smiled. She could appreciate Ben’s humor.

“Permission granted to go smash things,” she joked. “But if you think of anything else, let me know.”

He nodded, but didn’t sever the connection just yet.

“Be careful,” he urged her. “Don’t trust him. He would kill the entire galaxy, as long as he would get to rule it.”

She nodded slowly, and the next moment she knew it, he was gone.

She had gotten the gist of Ben’s opinion of Hux, but it seemed like it didn’t fully match up with what she’d seen in his subconscious.

Hux was afraid, that much was clear. And terribly isolated. Ben had mentioned none of the man’s fears, and from what she had seen in his subconscious, there was hardly anything but fear in him.

Maybe she just needed another perspective.

+++

There was only one man in the Resistance that knew all the dirt on General Hux, and was delighted to discuss it with Rey at the same time.

“No, and get this, but Hux was born the son of Brendol Hux, an old and respected general in the Empire, and a kitchen maid!” Poe explained, gesturing enthusiastically over the holonet. “Brendol’s wife was furious when she found out he’d had an illegitimate child. And then when he was three or so, they had to flee their home planet, Arkanis, because the Populists took over from the Centrists and everyone who’d had ties with the Empire was hunted and kicked out. So he grew up among these other Empire officials, many of which we still don’t know to this day what happened to them, and he was in charge of training First Order stormtroopers along with his father. Then when his father died, when he was already an adult, a few years before we met, he took over the stormtrooper training program completely, and he was involved in developing Starkiller Base. That was his baby. If you haven’t seen the speech he gave the First Order troops the day he destroyed the Hosnian System, you should. That should tell you all you need to know about him.”

Rey was glad for all the intel Poe had shared with her, but once more she felt like none of Hux’s fears were even hinted at in anything he had told her about the First Order General.

“What did he seem like to you?” Rey asked. “Personality-wise?”

Poe shook his head. “He had a stick up his butt. Several sticks, perhaps.” Seeing Rey’s mildly shocked expression, he cleared his throat. “He seemed like no fun at all. I don’t think he’s ever laughed in his lifetime. He seems like a workaholic and a suck-up. Very ambitious, and thinks very highly of himself. I think he trusts nobody but himself, and genuinely believes he’s the only one fit for ruling the Galaxy.”

It seemed like Poe enjoyed all this gossip a great amount, but Rey had to admit that it was far more useful than what Ben had told her. She had a better understanding of Hux’s past now, and the image Poe painted of Hux fell in line with what she had seen. It just appeared like all of Hux’s fears had been very well hidden from the rest of the galaxy.

“Do you think he was afraid of something?”

Poe shrugged. “Afraid of not getting promoted, perhaps?” Poe suggested. “Afraid of his own mortality, maybe. Why?”

“He has nightmares,” Rey admitted. She didn’t mind confiding that in Poe. “Constantly. About battle, and Snoke… It’s bloody, and painful.”

Poe sat back, his amused expression of before changing to a more serious one.

“Good,” he muttered. Upon seeing Rey’s raised eyebrow, he added defensively: “People want him dead, Rey. Knowing that he is suffering through constant nightmares is a small consolation for keeping him alive.”

Though his words bothered her, she didn’t show it.

“Thank you for everything, Poe,” she said politely. “If anything else comes to mind, don’t hesitate to get in touch with me.”

“Will do!” Poe promised, offering her one of his dazzling smiles before the connection was severed and Rey was left with her own thoughts again.

Both Ben and Poe had seemed adamant that Hux was not to be trusted, but was she really at risk when she was inside his mind, inside his subconscious? Didn’t she see a truer form of him than they ever had?

If she gave up now, the codes would be lost forever. She had to try again.

But part of her didn’t just want the codes. Part of her wanted him to be at peace, somehow. Wouldn’t that be a fair trade? Maybe she wouldn’t feel as much as though she was using him for their own gain if she gave him something in return.

+++

It had been a full day since her first attempt when she went back in.

In what, she did not know. His heart, his soul, his mind?

Whatever it was, she’d already sensed in the Force that he wasn’t in a good place. His anxiety had been nearly tangible, but she hoped she could help him face that and overcome it.

She didn’t fully understand why he was so anxious, for the place she found herself in, was a meeting room. It didn’t seem dangerous.

While she was standing near the wall, the First Order crew around the table was focused on a hologram of Snoke. Snoke seemed to be listening intently as each General took the word.

Rey noticed that the man besides Hux spoke more than most, and as she suddenly noticed his ginger hair, and the clipped way in which he spoke, she realized that this had to be his father, Brendol Hux.

It didn’t seem to be a particularly stressful scenario to Rey, until she realized that everytime Hux wanted to speak up and say something, his father interrupted him or continued his sentence, never leaving him to say anything for himself.

Nobody stood up for him, and when he finally did it himself, demanding everyone’s full attention and even standing up from his seat in order to secure it, Snoke disdainfully asked him to take a seat again, then asked Brendol a question instead.

Rey found it aggravating and could feel how devastated he was, and wondered if such a scenario ever played out quite as literally. Was he just exaggerating tiny grievances of his life in his subconscious mind? She couldn’t imagine him ever going through exactly the same, so surely it was more of a fear than a memory?

She had to try and become an ally to him, so he could overcome these fears and she’d be able to have a normal conversation with him, in some way.

Taking her lightsaber in hand, she walked towards the table and cleared her throat.

“If I were you, I would let Hux speak. And you’d better listen to him!”

She had no trouble speaking in such a commanding way when she knew it was all just in Hux’s imagination. None of this was real and there would be no real-life consequences to whatever she said or did.

Everyone seemed surprised, even Hux. But the first who spoke, was his father.

“Yes, let me speak!” Brendol Hux agreed, and Rey saw how Armitage sank deeper into his chair, all hope escaping his expression again.

“Not you,” Rey sneered at him. “This Hux! The smart one!”

She could see how the youngest Hux beamed at that compliment, sitting a little straighter again.

For now, it seemed like he had regained his confidence, and he cleared his throat.

“Yes, excellent! As I was saying – Starkiller Base will need to find a planet that can be a host to its…”

“It will be too expensive!” Hux senior interrupted him, earning nods from the other generals around him. “We don’t have the resources for it, and…”

Rey had heard enough. With a lazy swipe of her lightsaber, she took care of Brendol Hux.

His head never hit the floor, for it seemed he vanished in thin air the moment she literally got rid of him.

But he wasn’t the only one that vanished, the others disappeared as well, until only Armitage Hux was left.

He was quiet, and as Rey sat down in the chair opposite his, she looked at him. His gaze was dazed again – like he wasn’t fully in the moment, just like before, but a part of him was trying to take her in. She could tell by the way he frowned every now and then that he was forcing himself to focus.

“Take a deep breath,” she told him. “Don’t panic and don’t be afraid. I’m not here to hurt you in any way.”

His response was not what she had expected. Instead of him calming down, his eyes welled up with tears. His hands were shaking.

“Hux?” Rey’s gaze was slightly worried. “Please talk to me. I want to help you, but I don’t know how. Not really.”

“I can’t wake up,” he muttered. He closed his eyes, and Rey noticed how their surroundings disappeared again, before they came back in a few flashes of light. “I can’t wake up, and I know I’m dreaming. This has to be a dream!”

“I know,” she said softly. “I know that has to be frustrating. We can talk about it. Please, talk to me. Don’t try to run.”

The room steadied around them again, and he looked at her, his gaze no longer as dazed as before. There was a quiet calm in his eyes she hadn’t seen before.

“I know I’m dreaming,” he told her. “Because I saw you kill my father just now, but I know that’s not real. I killed him, years ago.”

Rey hadn’t known that – even if it didn’t really come as a surprise.

“So what just happened was a nightmare,” he concluded. “But now it’s not a nightmare. But why would my mind show you to me?”

He didn’t seem to realize or accept that she was here on her own accord. But how could he? No one had ever done this before, no one that she knew of. Maybe it was better if she pretended to be a part of his own mind, maybe that would make it easier to secure the codes from him.

As she sat there, she suddenly noticed how he got up and walked to her, offering her his hand.

She almost would have described it as an elegant, romantic gesture, and when she put her hand in his and he helped her stand up, the room around them disappeared again.

It was just the two of them, in a dark, but silent void. His thumb was rubbing gently over her fingers, and she wanted to know what was going through his mind. He was so quiet, his mind racing, and when he suddenly leaned in and pressed a kiss to her cheek, she gulped.

Her heart had skipped a beat as well, and she found herself trembling when he wrapped an arm around her back and gently began to kiss her neck.

Even if it was a dream of sorts, it still felt real to her, and she was petrified. It didn’t feel bad, quite the opposite, but was it a good idea to allow this? Would this bring her further from her goal, or closer to it?

“You’re not very responsive,” he remarked as he stopped his kisses and looked at her again. “And you look rough around the edges.” He seemed terribly confused by that. “I always thought I’d fall for a more sophisticated being than you. Maybe this is my mind’s way of saying I am not deserving of someone better.”

Rey had raised her eyebrows at that. Was he roasting her in his subconscious? What a snob!

“Or maybe…” He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. “Maybe it’s telling me that looks aren’t everything, and I should value the way in which you stood up for me. You just killed my father for me. If that isn’t a sign of loyalty, I don’t know what is.”

Rey tried not to flinch under the constant touch of his fingertips. He hadn’t removed them from her face.

“You’re so soft,” he continued, not looking at her eyes, but at her lips. “And any woman can wear a fancy dress. But not every woman would be brave enough to stand up to the First Order. Maybe that’s what you represent. Maybe I need to learn to appreciate your raw beauty and your courage.”

Those words were a little kinder, and Rey was no longer as upset with his earlier words.

But when he leaned in and kissed her on the lips, she was still caught off-guard.

The problem was not that it was a bad kiss – it really wasn’t. It was amazing, and Rey certainly hadn’t imagined a kiss to be like this, not even an imaginary one. She wondered if a real one would feel the same, if it would be better or worse, and for a moment she reacted on instinct, kissing him back, and ignoring the voice in the back of her mind that told her she was a Jedi, and she had to try to avoid ties like this to anyone.

But it was infinitely better than any type of Jedi meditation, and she could not resist. After all, what was the harm in giving into a dream?

+++

Hux had lived a life without love.

Maybe his birth mother had loved him, but he had no memory of her.

His family certainly hadn’t loved him, nor had his peers. As he had aged, every now and then his gaze had been drawn by people of the opposite sex, but he had always forbidden himself to engage in a relationship. The focus had been his work for the First Order.

Unlike his father, he’d been careful not to have any bastards.

And unlike his father, he had never married or even had a girlfriend. He also had never kissed someone, and so as he kissed the Jedi girl, he savored the sensation without pushing for more. It was pleasant and more than enough – and more importantly: it was very safe, for she wasn’t even real.

He sometimes slipped out of consciousness, and in those moments he wasn’t aware of the dream he was having, he was passively living through it, but in that moment, he held onto his consciousness. He didn’t want it to slip because he did not want her to slip from his grasp either. She was a welcome distraction from the torture and pain of most of his dreams.

He knew that if he thought about his state of mind for too long, he usually panicked and lost his grasp on it, with nightmares as a result. He was not going to allow that to happen, and so he gently kissed her instead, holding her firmly in his arms.

As he pulled back to look at her, he’d hoped to see the quiet affection that he felt mirrored in her eyes, but there was some discomfort too, and he wondered why.

“Did I do something wrong?” he wondered.

She looked guilty now, and shook her head. As he raised an eyebrow at her, she seemed to give in and finally answered: “You’re not a good man, and I’m a Jedi. We shouldn’t kiss.”

He smiled. She was cute. “It’s just a dream,” he told her. “We can do whatever we want to do. None of this is real.”

As he kissed her again, for a moment she allowed it, until she pushed him away.

His heart skipped a beat. He just hoped it wasn’t the start of a nightmare, it had been so delightful before.

“Convince me you’re not a bad man,” she said. “Tell me something good you did in your life.”

He frowned. For a dream, that was a weird question, and it threw him off for a moment.

“I have worked hard all my life, for the good of the First Order and the galaxy. Once we are in control, there shall be peace. I will have helped secure it from the very top!”

She hoped his words would convince her and she’d return to his arms, but she didn’t seem convinced. At all. She looked at him as though he was insane.

“Something else,” she urged.

He thought for a moment. “Stormtroopers!” he said. “We have taken these poor children from backwater planets and given them a future. Instead of starving and being a burden to their families, we took them in, we trained them, we fed them and gave them a chance to have purpose in our society!”

She was still frowning.

“No,” she said. “Not like that. What have you ever done out of love instead of logic and opportunity?”

He stared blankly at her. What kind of weird questions was his subconscious even firing at him?

“Nothing,” he replied eventually. “I can’t recall ever loving anything.”

She looked sad.

Maybe he’d let her down, and he felt sad too then. He carefully stepped closer and took her hands in his.

“I wish I could love a woman like you,” he whispered. “Someone brave and pretty and smart. But love is a weakness that people would exploit. Loving you would put you at risk. People would come for your head, if they knew it would hurt me. They’ve always tried to hurt me, with whatever weapon available.”

He caressed her cheek again and saw there was a tear in her eye.

“What a sad realization,” he muttered. “Maybe I could have had someone as lovely as you in my life, and now I know I never can, because someone needs to lead the First Order. It is my calling.”

“Hux…” She was quiet as she thought for a moment. “The… The First Order is no more. The Resistance has won.”

The realization of that chilled him, but he briefly shook his head. Was that how she was going to turn into a nightmare?

“Don’t you remember?” she asked him. “The battle over Kuat? You were in your Star Destroyer. But it was a trap. The Resistance had you outnumbered and unable to ask for backup with their jamming signals.”

He remembered the shouting and the sound of X-Wings and the exploding panels all around him. He’d forgotten, but it was the truth.

“I lost consciousness,” he remembered. “Something exploded.”

There was no memory after that. Nothing. Just nightmare after nightmare after nightmare.

And now, finally, _her_.

He looked at her sad expression and mirrored it with his own.

“You’ve been in a coma ever since,” she told him, and he shook his head as he frowned.

“No,” he replied. “No, I’m not in a coma.”

He didn’t want to be. But it made more sense than anything.

“That’s why you weren’t able to wake up from your nightmares,” she replied softly. “I don’t know if you ever can.”

He tried to wake again and shut his eyes. He balled his fists and wished so hard for it to happen, but when he opened them again, there was just nothingness, and her.

Exhausted, he dropped to the floor, tears streaming down his cheeks.

She knelt behind him and gently stroked his hair. It was soothing, comforting, and he closed his eyes. Maybe he couldn’t wake up, but maybe he could fall asleep instead. It would be less painful than facing the truth.

As he drifted away, she disappeared as well. Maybe it was better this way.

+++

As Rey found herself besides an unconscious Hux again, she realized that his mind had drifted off elsewhere – to a place even darker than his subconscious mind.

He still didn’t realize she was real, but that was alright. She still hadn’t asked him for the codes, but that was alright too. The codes no longer were her number one priority in this mission.

She gently brought her hand to Hux’s ginger hair and stroked her fingers through it.

He was going a little gray around his temples – something she hadn’t noticed in his mind. He probably didn’t even know how much time had passed. He hadn’t even felt his body age.

She felt incredibly sorry for him, for all of him. He had been raised without love or empathy, and she wondered if he ever could have been a decent human being. Maybe it was best he was unconscious now.

As she leaned in, she pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.

“I’ll be back soon,” she whispered. “Sleep well.”

+++

Rey had spent her day training, meditating and reading. After sharing a brief dinner with doctor Kalonia, she headed towards the operating room again.

Doctor Kalonia had expressed curiosity in Rey’s mission, but Rey had cut that particular topic short by saying things like: “It’s too soon to tell” and “I need more time to succeed”. She didn’t want to let anyone know about the weaknesses she had seen in Hux’s mind, or even worse, about how much she’d enjoyed kissing him.

A Jedi was not supposed to form any bonds, yet she found herself drawn to Hux now, and the fact that he hardly had a conscious mind wasn’t making her feel better about that attraction. Was this the Dark Side of the Force, in some way? Was she making a grave mistake?

Or was his existence in this conscious-less way irrelevant to the flow of the Force? Surely there was no harm in indulging in dreams?

As she entered his mind again, she noticed she was in complete darkness. She couldn’t even see her own hands, but hurt muttering in the distance.

“Where is Armitage?” she heard Brendol Hux say, as though he was behind a nearby wall. “I just spoke to his teacher. He’s third in his class. Third! If he can’t learn his lessons himself, I’ll teach him one!”

Rey had no idea where she even was, or why she couldn’t see anything, and sensed her surroundings with her hands. When she poked something, she heard someone gasp.

“Hux?” she asked, realizing she’d poked him in the gut.

Saying his name was enough to wake him from this nightmare, and suddenly she saw a light go on and noticed how they were both sitting in a large closet.

He was wearing his First Order uniform again, and she her white Jedi outfit, and he looked at her affectionately.

“Where are we?” she asked him.

“One of the houses where my father lived when I was about ten. I’d done badly on a test.”

“Being third of your class doesn’t sound bad though…”

“It was to my father,” Hux said, taking a deep breath as he got up and pulled Rey up as well.

With her hands still in his, he leaned in to kiss her cheek.

It was only a brief kiss, and when she looked into his eyes she saw affection again.

“You seem so surprised,” he remarked. “Do you not think me capable of kindness?”

Rey wasn’t sure. No one else had even seen his kindness. But he did seem… sweet, sometimes.

“You’re right,” he said before she’d even responded. “I guess I haven’t really ever shown any affection in my lifetime. I’m wondering if I ever would have, now.”

He seemed sad again, though no longer as sad as before.

“If this is a coma, then I wonder how I’m making you up. Or why… But I’m glad that I am, because I finally feel a little bit awake now, sometimes. Especially when you’re near me.”

She allowed him to touch her face, and even smiled at the sensation of his fingertips against her cheek. If touching her grounded him in some way, then maybe it wasn’t bad if she allowed it.

“Father and I always took inspiration from Jedi,” he told her. “The way in which we trained our Stormtroopers was based on the way in which Jedi raised their own. You have to separate them from a young age so they fully embrace the lifestyle, without anything holding them back. Maybe that’s why you appear to me. Maybe you’re supposed to represent a Stormtrooper, in some way – but without the armor or something. Kissing a stormtrooper would just be weird.”

Rey chuckled with that analysis, and when he saw her laugh, he smiled.

“But you are a good being,” he concluded. “I would have preferred you as an ally over Kylo Ren. Maybe that’s why you appear as a Jedi to me. Maybe the First Order should have aligned itself with the Jedi instead of the loathsome Ren and his Knights.”

Rey could only listen as Hux sorted out his thoughts. Was it cruel that she let him believe her being there was a trick of his subconscious, while she clearly knew she was not?

“Maybe I’m just here to make you a better man,” she said softly, smiling mysteriously, and from the way he looked at her, she knew that he loved watching her smile. His eyes had lit up in response, and he seemed more awake than ever.

When he kissed her on the lips, she smiled as well.

It figured that he had taken that as an invitation to kiss, instead of as a more serious statement. She was curious if she could ever make him a better person.

Pulling back from their kiss, she looked up at him and put her own hand on his cheek.

“Hux, if you’d met me, outside, in the real world, and I’d asked you to join me, would you have done it?”

“No.”

His answer took no reflection at all. He knew it as certain as his name.

“Because I’m loyal to the First Order,” he told her. “I was raised to rule it. So I would not have abandoned it.” He smiled. “But I would have yearned for your companionship. I think I would have offered you a place by my side instead.”

Rey was looking for cracks in his loyalty to the Dark Side. Maybe somehow, she could get him to be better, but so far it seemed like nothing would make him see that the First Order had been horrible for the galaxy.

Maybe she never would get that far with him. Maybe she was trying to change something that was fixed, and the coma made all her efforts in vain.

“Would you have given me the secret codes to the First Order’s most secret projects?”

“No,” he replied with a smile. “Not in real life.”

“But you would give them here?” she asked, her heart beating a little faster and she tried not to sound too eager.

“Of course,” he replied. “This all isn’t real.”

Rey gulped. She had to thread carefully now.

“Do you remember the code? Even with your coma?”

“I think so!” he replied, and he suddenly started giving her about two dozen numbers. It was a long code, and she hoped she hadn’t forgotten it.

“Could you repeat it?”

He did so without a second thought, and Rey knew that she couldn’t spend more time with him now, or she’d certainly forget it.

Pulling herself out of his mind, she cursed the fact that she had no data pad nearby, and instead she took a nearby scalpel and started scratching it into the plaster walls.

She went over the code a few times in her mind. She was certain she hadn’t made any mistakes.

Putting the scalpel down again, she realized that she could call Rose, give the code, and be on her merry way again in an hour or so.

But would her way be merry, if she left Hux alone with his nightmares?

She still hadn’t helped him, and feared that if she left, he’d still be stuck in his own anxious mind.

Sitting down by his side, she closed her eyes and tried to connect with him in the Force again. The codes could wait.

+++

She appeared in a dark and rainy forest, Hux standing in front of her, his back to her. Not realizing her presence, he was looking at a small clearing next to a lake, and seemed to be focusing very hard – his hands pointing towards the area.

She felt like she was intruding on something important, and just watched him for a few moments, seeing before her eyes how a little metal bunker appeared out of thin air. When he started walking towards it, she followed him, and it was by the noise of her feet that he was alerted.

“Rey!” he exclaimed happily. “I didn’t realize you were still here! Am I glad to see you! Look!” He gestured towards the bunker. “A house!”

Rey wouldn’t immediately have called it a house, for it looked a bit too sterile to be such a thing, but she could imagine that to Hux, it would suffice.

“It’s a bunker so I’ll be safe if the Resistance finds me,” he told her. “It can withstand a decent amount of fire. The First Order created bunkers like this on a few planets. The plans were in the encrypted files, I suppose that’s what my mind was trying to tell me when you asked me for the code, that I should use the knowledge from the files to protect myself!”

Rey knew that it wasn’t his mind that was manipulating the flow of his dreams, it was her doing – but part of her was relieved that he seemed to be making his mind a more peaceful place to be.

As they arrived at the bunker, Hux typed in the same clearance code again, and Rey watched closely. She was certain she hadn’t made a mistake when writing down the code now, and followed him into the bunker when the door opened.

While the outside had looked sterile, the inside was a tiny bit more personal. There was abstract art on the walls, as well as a large bed and several data pads on a table. The couch looked more comfortable than any Rey had ever sat on, despite its sleek look, and when Hux sat down on it, Rey sat down not too far from him.

She had hardly looked at him, but he had already moved over, his arm around her shoulder as he sat next to her. He wanted to be close to her, and wasn’t aware that she would rather keep a little bit of distance between them.

“I’m happy you have this safe house where nothing can harm you,” Rey said, hoping that words would keep him from kissing her. She wasn’t certain if she could resist.

“Yes,” he replied absentmindedly. “We can both be safe here. I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

Sweet words for an evil man, Rey thought to herself, feeling a little miserable. Maybe it would have been easier if he had tried to hurt her and fight her like the enemy she was. Then she could have left his mind without ever feeling bad about leaving him.

Though her mission seemed at an end now she had the code, she just couldn’t leave him just yet. It didn’t feel like the right thing to do.

He sighed deeply. “Part of me wants to remain here with you, another part wants to wake up so badly. It’s agony to be here. I want to know what is happening with the First Order.”

He didn’t realize yet that they had lost, and Rey gulped.

“What if they lost?” she asked gently. “Are you certain you would want to wake if the First Order was no more?”

Hux frowned, a little upset with her for even saying such a thing.

“I’m still alive, Rey. That means that the First Order must have found me. The Resistance wouldn’t let me live.”

Why he thought such a thing, she didn’t fully understand. “They would!” she argued. “Executions are not their thing, that’s a First Order thing.”

He seemed a little taken aback by that statement and looked at her in surprise.

“I guess you’re right,” he admitted. “But if I’m in a coma, why would they waste resources on keeping me alive, being their enemy?”

“Because they value all life,” Rey replied honestly. “Even that of villains that blow up entire planets without batting an eye. And… they want to give you a fair trial, I assume.”

Hux rolled his eyes. Though he had listened, he did not respond to her words.

“How would you defend yourself at such a trial?” she asked, curious about his response, but he suddenly turned towards her and looked kindly at her face instead. He caressed her cheek as he had done before, and leaned in for a kiss.

When she leaned backwards, away from him, he still tried to kiss her, but stopped the moment she pushed him back against his shoulders.

“Hux, please, don’t…” she said softly, part of her disappointed more in herself than in him. Why wasn’t she letting it happen? It hadn’t been bad the previous times.

Confused, he tilted his head.

“Rey?”

She looked him in the yes.

“Do you love me?” he asked simply. 

Surprised by his question, she tilted her own head as she thought about it.   
She felt something for him, but was it love? It was much too confusing to her to recognize as such immediately. Maybe it was, because she’d never felt exactly this way for anyone, not even for Ben, and she was drawn to him in some ways – but in others she just wanted to run.

“Hux, don’t ask that,” she replied in a pained tone.

“Do you love me?” he asked again, stubbornly now.

It couldn’t be love, she decided. Surely this was not love.

“Well… No, Hux, I don’t love you,” she replied simply, even if her emotions were far more complex.

“Why?” he wanted to know, his voice shaking suddenly. “Why don’t you love me?” He seemed terribly confused. “I love you. I want to be with you. Why are you rejecting me? Isn’t it simple?”

Thinking she was a part of his imagination, he was more upset with himself than with her.

“No, Hux,” Rey insisted. “It’s not simple! How can I love you? I’m a Jedi and…”

“Is it because Jedi aren’t allowed to be with anyone?” he interrupted her immediately. “Because I thought Jedi were at least encouraged to love – that that was what you represented – and we kissed before and I’ve seen the way you look at me. You love me!”

If he had mistaken her glances of pity and empathy for love, then it was only proof of how love-starved he had been all his life. He couldn’t recognize it.

Could she?

She tried not to think about it too much and shook her head.

“Hux, no, I can’t love anyone…. anyone who’s evil. You’re evil!” It pained her to say it. “Look at… Look at how you enjoyed destroying the entire Hosnian system! There’s no one in this galaxy that takes as much pleasure from hurting others as you do!”

He was quiet as he listened to her, and so she continued.

“You might not want to hurt me for whatever reason. But you have taken pleasure from killing other people. You’ve made it your life’s work to bring destruction in the name of the First Order and… and I feel pity for you, but… I don’t think I can ever love you.”

Tears had come to his eyes, and Rey felt a little bad for her hard words. She hadn’t wanted to make him miserable. She had wanted him to be at peace before she left, but she feared now that maybe her words had planted a seed of doubt and misery that he would carry with him for the rest of his life in this subconscious plane.

He wiped his own tears away, though they did not stop coming.

“It’s true,” he whispered. “No one can ever love me. My father certainly didn’t. Nor did any of my peers. Nor could a Jedi, the symbol of love and hope in this Galaxy. I could have been admired, but never truly loved. Maybe it doesn’t exist. Maybe I should not hope for that, but just for lust. Am I not attractive to you?”

Rey took a deep breath. His questions weren’t getting any easier.

“I should go,” she decided, but as she got up, he took a hold of her hand.

“Don’t go,” he pleaded, but she tried to pull back from him again, despite his pleas. “I don’t want you to go. I can control my own mind, so don’t go.”

But she wasn’t a part of his mind, and she really wanted to leave now.

“Just let go,” she asked him. “Let me go.”

“No!” he decided. “No, I’m coming with you!”

It seemed like they were arguing over nothing. He could not come with her, not where she was going, and despite the way he clung to her, she tried to rip herself out of his mind, back into her own, and once more had trouble keeping her balance the moment she found herself clutching the operating table.

She was just about to let out a deep sigh, when she heard a deep gasp by her side.

Looking at Hux, her heart stopped for a moment.

His eyes were wide open and awake, and terrified as they looked at her.


	2. Chapter 2

Rey gulped.

Hux was awake.

It was not what she had expected at all, and she had no time to prepare for it now. Even worse, he started coughing, and as Rey stepped closer to him in an instinct, she realized that he wasn’t just coughing – he seemed to be choking – somehow.

Not wasting one second, Rey rushed out of the room, using the Force to speed her through the corridor, crying for doctor Kalonia as loudly as she could.

The moment the doctor appeared, Rey quickly said: “Hux is awake!”

The doctor and a few droids followed her back through the corridor, into the room where Hux was still coughing, hardly moving except for the way in which his body involuntarily shook as he tried to catch his breath, but failed.

Doctor Kalonia was silent as she worked, her droids apparently knowing exactly what she needed for they handed her a respiratory mask, which she quickly put over Hux’s mouth. He had nearly lost consciousness again, but the doctor had acted just in time. Now, his eyes were half-lidded as they looked at the doctor, then slowly let them slide towards Rey.

The young Jedi was tense, and not certain if she was happy or horrified that he had woken up.

With Hux stabilized, the doctor spoke again.

“We see this response often when someone wakes up from a long coma. Your body is no longer what it was before – your muscles have weakened and the moment you woke, you must have had a bit of a scare, causing you to inhale deeper than your body has done in years. Hence why you could hardly catch your breath. The mask will help for now, as will the proper medication.”

Hux had listened, and the doctor turned to Rey now.

“We must inform the others. They will want to put him on trial.”

Rey immediately shook her head.

“No.”

Her response was fiercer than either Kalonia or Hux had expected.

She turned a little red in the face, but held her ground.

“We can’t tell them just yet, not over a regular channel. It’s too dangerous. They’ll want to send soldiers, and too many people will know he’s here. He’s too hated – and I don’t want to fight off bounty hunters or assassins or random soldiers with a grudge. I’ll inform Leia in private, and will keep a personal eye on him until he’s able to travel.”

“That might take a few weeks,” the doctor replied, not really eager with Rey’s proposal.

“Then we’ll give him a few weeks.”

Rey looked at Hux, whose wide eyes did not betray his emotions just yet.

“Fine.” Doctor Kalonia wasn’t happy. “I’ll get some medication that should help him recover faster.”

As she left the room, followed by her medical droids, Rey turned to Hux again.

He was looking at her, and when she moved closer and put her hand in his, she realized how limp it was. He really didn’t seem to have the same level of control over his muscles as a regular man.

Then, suddenly, she felt a soft squeeze in her hand, and as she looked back into his eyes, she saw that he had parted his lips slightly, hardly moving them as he whispered: “Thank you.”

He’d hardly made a sound at all, but Rey had heard, and her heart fluttered.

She wasn’t certain if it was from joy or dread.

+++

Doctor Kalonia gave Hux an injection of a strange liquid, a medicine, according to the doctor, that would give temporary strength to anyone that took it.

She explained that if she took it herself, it would make her muscles capable of much heavier labor, but that she would also be able to smack the door from its hinges, or to hurt herself and fracture her own bones in her carelessness.

For those who had been comatose for a long while and had lost all strength in their muscles, it was the perfect way to get back to their regular strength in a very short amount of time. Every day the dose would decrease, until his own muscles were strengthened and allowed him to stand up straight again.

Only a few minutes after injecting the dose, the doctor took off his respiration mask, and it seemed like he was able to breathe without its aid for now.

“I’m not taking it from this room just yet,” she told him. “When the medicine wears out, you might want to put it on again. You’ll feel it yourself. It usually lasts for something between three to five hours before it starts wearing off.”

He nodded, then whispered: “Thank you, doctor.”

Though perfectly polite, the doctor did not want his thanks, it seemed, for she had a frown on her face.

Rey had no doubt that Doctor Kalonia had a good bedside manner as a doctor, but it wasn’t every day she stood face to face with the man that had destroyed the Hosnian system.

“I will stand guard,” Rey assured the doctor. “Is there anything I must know?”

Doctor Kalonia seemed a little reluctant and lowered her voice a bit. “He will be able to walk and speak with the help of this medicine. And it’s important that he does. That’s how he’ll rehabilitate. He must use those muscles in order to restore them. The medicine will make them stronger. No overexertion for now though – no lifting or running. No shouting.”

“Understood,” Rey said. “I will call you when something’s wrong.”

The doctor nodded. “I’ll leave a droid in the hallway to send a signal at the first sign of trouble.”

Rey could agree to that, and when the doctor left, she didn’t turn back to Hux just yet. She wasn’t entirely certain how to face him.

After taking a deep breath, she did turn around, only to see his face turned away from her. Instead, he was looking at the wall, and as Rey followed his gaze, her heart stopped.

The code… He was looking at the code she’d written on the wall, the moment she had stolen it from his mind.

As she walked closer to him and stopped by his bedside, he softly said: “I suppose it makes sense that that is the only reason why you entered my mind. I don’t assume you wanted to wake me from my coma?”

His voice was still little more than a whisper, and so Rey kept her voice down as well.

“Not really,” she replied. “I can’t imagine what awaits you next to be much of an improvement.”

Hux turned his head to look into her eyes again.

“How badly did we lose?” he asked, steeling his gaze. “What happened to the First Order?”

Rey took no pleasure from breaking it to him, but gently told him: “Stormtroopers and Officers were given the opportunity to join the New Republic, and most took up those offers to help the New Republic in other ways. Ships were dismantled and those unwilling to aid were imprisoned. There is no more First Order.”

He looked away, and though he tried not to show it, Rey could feel how dreadful that news made him feel. It had to feel hopeless, to realize all your allies were gone.

“I don’t suppose they’ll want me anywhere but in jail,” Hux said, a little louder this time.

“I don’t suppose so,” Rey replied honestly.

He tried to sit up straight, the muscles in his arms trembling a little as he supported himself to sit up. Only then did the blanket slide down and did he realize he was hardly wearing anything.

Rey looked at his thin frame and found that he looked weak. Maybe he’d looked weaker before, but now that he was using those muscles himself, it was clear that his body was just a shell of what it had been before.

“Do I have clothes?” he asked.

Rey didn’t know what to say. “I… eh…” she looked around, but obviously there were no clothes in this room. She didn’t know where there were any and instead opened the door to the hallway, to instruct the droid to get some clothes for the patient.

“How long have I been here?” he wondered next. “Must have been months.”

Uncertain how to break it to him, she shook her head. “Longer,” she said. “Years.”

“Years?” He sighed. It was not what he had hoped for. “How many?”

“Three.”

“Three?” He wasn’t happy with that news either, but seemed to accept it, and sat very still on the operating table.

Rey didn’t know what to do or say to break the silence between them, and was grateful when the service droid entered. It was carrying a white bundle of clothes. A simple shirt and loose trousers, along with some slippers were handed to Rey. When she gave them to Hux, his nose wrinkled disdainfully. He had hoped for a uniform of sorts, but was not going to remark on it.

As he put it on, Rey stepped back again, but she did not look away. Simultaneously, she tried not to stare too much. She was meant to watch over him, to make sure he stayed out of trouble, surely there was no cause for her to look at his hardly-clad body the way she was?

His hands were still trembling as he worked his way through putting on the shirt and trousers, and he seemed to be a little wobbly on his feet, holding onto the operating table.

“Are you alright?” Rey asked softly.

“A little dizzy,” he admitted.

“Maybe you should sit down,” Rey offered, but he immediately shook his head.

“If I’m going to stand trial in a few weeks, I want to do so in a composed way. Without trembling or fainting, by standing on my own two feet.”

He straightened his back proudly.

“I should train my muscles,” he continued. Turning to her, he added: “Will you walk with me?”

Rey nodded quickly and stepped closer to him, ready to support him in case he needed assistance.

He seemed fine to stand on his own, and headed towards the door.

“Where are we?” he asked.

Rey opened the door for him and let him into the hallway.

“Giddea,” she replied.

“Cheerful place,” he remarked dryly, and Rey couldn’t help but smile because of it.

As he walked through the hallway, he had his hands clasped behind his back and his posture straight. But he was rather slow, and his jaw was locked as he focused on every muscle in his body.

“I… I want to apologize,” Rey said, quickly adding: “Not that I’m entirely certain I should, but… I’m sorry for bringing you back into this world.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” he replied. “It was not your intention. It’s my own fault I’m in this mess now. I just… I had no idea you weren’t something my mind had made up. Strange, how that works.”

Rey hummed in agreement. “Strange, indeed.”

+++

They walked through the hallway half a dozen times, its closed doors betraying nothing of what lay behind them.

Hux was unaware of the kind of facility he was in, and had so far shown no interest in it.

“Was I the only patient here?” he wondered, realizing that there was no activity at all in the corridor. There was only them and the droid.

“No,” Rey answered truthfully. “There are others like you were – comatose.” As they reached the end of the hallway, where they could enter the large ward and see the others, she stopped, her hand on the door. “I can show you,” she offered, and as he realized that she wasn’t going to keep him confined to the hallway if he behaved, he nodded eagerly.

Opening the door, he slowly walked in, seeing the dark room with dozens of beds and bacta tanks. Droids were attending to some of the patients in their unconscious states while Doctor Kalonia pursed her lips together at the sight of Hux. She was not going to argue with Rey and send him back though, and returned her attention to the patients.

“Are they all First Order?” Hux asked, looking at Rey, and as she nodded, he grew silent.

He stepped from bed to bed, looking at files of the patients that hung against the wall, reading their names before he looked at their faces to see if he knew them personally.

Only after about seven beds, did a small shock of recognition go through him. Rey saw it in the way he looked at the patient in the bed.

“I knew him,” he said softly. “He was a petty officer – Thanisson. What happened? How did he get in here?”

Rey shook her head slowly. “I don’t know.”

She knew nothing of these other patients, but Hux was not satisfied with that answer.

Without hesitation, he took the datapad from the bedside table and looked into Thanisson’s file.

He’d hardly read anything, or a strict voice said: “Put that down.”

Both Rey and Hux turned their head simultaneously, and looked into the white-hot face of Doctor Kalonia.

“That information is confidential, and you have no right to it.”

“I beg to differ!” Hux protested immediately, not putting the datapad down. “I am his superior officer.”

“_Was_,” Doctor Kalonia reminded him. “The First Order is no more, hence you have no rank here whatsoever.”

Now it was Hux whose rage was building, and he looked seriously pissed off.

“Maybe to you I am no longer in charge of him, but I wish to know what happened that put him here.”

“Then you could ask his doctor, which happens to be me!” Kalonia said, not backing down from this.

Hux refused to do such a thing. Disdainfully, he dropped the datapad on the floor before he walked away from the bed, past Doctor Kalonia without casting her another glance.

The doctor’s mouth dropped from the blatant disrespect Hux showed to her, and Rey looked at her apologetically before she followed Hux as he walked back to the corridor. Once they were in the corridor again, she took a few bigger steps to catch up to him.

“Hux,” she said gently. “You shouldn’t do that.”

“Why not?” he asked, turning to her and impatiently waiting for her reply. “What should I do instead?”

Rey shook her head as she looked into his eyes. “At least try to be kind and respectful towards all living beings. It might stick.”

He rolled his eyes. “Why do you want me so badly to be good?”

With a deep sigh, she shrugged. “Because maybe it wouldn’t make me feel bad about waking you up from your coma.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, feeling like that wasn’t the whole truth behind it. “Or maybe you don’t want to admit to yourself that you kissed me when you were in my mind. General Hux of the First Order, destroyer of the Hosnian System and many other civilizations, kissing the last Jedi.” He smiled, finding it amusing. “That’s what bothers you, isn’t it?”

She was clearly upset by those words, frowning and blushing at the same time, and she averted her eyes for a moment.

“You have the potential to be different,” she insisted stubbornly, her voice rising a bit. “I know you can be better. And I know you can go to Doctor Kalonia and apologize for your rudeness and ask her politely for more information on Thanisson, if you really care to know about him and it wasn’t just an excuse to exert your dominance over strangers. Or maybe all you wanted to do was pick a fight like a bully would do, just like your father used to do to you!”

Now he was the one that looked whipped, and Rey could see that he was trembling in quiet rage – no doubt also in part because the medicine he’d taken was causing his hormones to go in overdrive.

He was trying his hardest to control himself, and turned away rather abruptly all of a sudden, heading back to his room, but Rey was right behind him. When he walked through the door, he slammed it close so fiercely that the door shuddered and creaked, and Rey jumped slightly.

Not afraid of him, she slowly opened the door and looked inside, seeing how he was sitting on the bed, trembling all over. His shoulders were shaking and he was dodging her gaze.

“Are you okay?” she asked in a softer tone.

“Physically or mentally?” he responded with a hint of sarcasm.

“Both?” she offered kindly.

“No,” he replied, raising his hands to look at how badly they trembled. “Adrenaline is raging and I’m not feeling well.”

Rey walked to stand before him and took his hands in hers.

“Breathe along with me, okay?”

As she inhaled, he looked at her and followed her example, and she guided him through a few minutes of breathing while she simultaneously tried to use the Force to calm him.

It worked, for he stopped trembling.

When he seemed calm again, he narrowed his eyes at her.

“You used the Force, didn’t you?”

She smiled mysteriously. “What if I did?”

His upper lip curled pleasantly. “It’s better than being smacked to the floor with it.”

Though he’d meant it as a joke, Rey’s response startled him. She had the most empathic look in her eyes, and for a moment he gulped. He hadn’t meant it as a means to get her pity.

“You were tossed around most of your life,” she slowly said. “I wish I’d been there at some point to help you.”

He shrugged it off, not wanting to think too much on that. “I probably would have stabbed you in the back at some point.”

They were quiet for a few moments. “And now?” she asked. “Would you still stab me in the back?”

“Would you trust my answer?” he asked with a half-smile.

“Don’t dodge my question!” she said in a stricter tone. “Answer honestly!”

He looked into her eyes for a long while, considering the question.

“Depends on the scenario,” he said eventually. “Right now, no, I don’t see me stabbing you in the back. But let’s assume that in three minutes, a bunch of bounty hunters storm in here to take you out and save me and bring me back to whoever remained in the First Order, then… I’d probably choose me.”

Rey smiled. “I suppose that’s fair. But I wouldn’t hold my breath for it, if I were you.”

“I know,” he replied, sighing.

“But you know, for the next weeks, you’re going to be stuck with me and Doctor Kalonia. And she has more information on all your First Order buddies than I do. If I were you, I’d apologize. You’re going to see a whole lot more of her.”

Hux was quiet for a few moments, then nodded.

“You’re right.” He frowned briefly. “Not about the ‘buddies’ though – they were colleagues at most.”

Rey smiled again.

“Need me to hold your hand as you apologize, or will you manage?”

He shot her a deadly glare. “I’ll manage, thank you very much.”

+++

Rey hadn’t been near as Hux had apologized to the good doctor, but according to the older woman, he’d been “adequately polite” and had resisted the urge to insult or infuriate her further.

When the medicine had worn out, he’d put the respiration mask on again, before he’d drifted off into sleep. Rey had left his room after a few minutes and had ordered a droid to watch over him and wake her the moment he woke.

She still hadn’t informed Leia. Nor had she told Rose she’d gotten the code.

She wasn’t willing to tell anyone Hux had awoken yet. She believed what she had told Doctor Kalonia – that she feared they wouldn’t give Hux the time he needed to recover, or that someone would like to play judge and jury over him and he’d never make it to a trial. He was too hated.

But she did contact Rose and gave her the code. Luckily, the call did not take long. Rose was too eager to try out if the code worked, and Rey didn’t want to talk about this particular mission.

Rose promised to get back to her to inform her if it had worked, and so Rey waited in her room for a call. She dozed off, but woke when Rose returned the call not long after the first. Rey knew she had hardly slept at all.

“It doesn’t work,” Rose said, a disappointed expression on her face. “I entered the code, even backwards, but it wasn’t accepted. And it makes sense, because this type of code has been tried dozens of times already. Maybe you should check again?”

Rey nodded slowly. “Yes, I will. I’ll get back to you.”

It seemed like Rose wanted to say more, but Rey ended the conversation there and broke the signal.

Had Hux lied to her in his subconscious mind? Had he made an honest mistake? Or was there another reason why it hadn’t worked? Was that why he hadn’t freaked out the moment he’d seen the code written on the wall? Maybe he’d known it wouldn’t work. Whatever the reason the code hadn’t been accepted, Rey would need to get back to her original mission.

+++

When Hux woke the following morning and opened his eyes, he saw her standing by his side, smiling at him.

“Good morning,” she sang softly, and not used to such a way to wake up, he closed his eyes again and grunted. He was still weak, but he was able to move his hand to his chest to scratch a spot that was itching. Opening one eye again, he saw she was still standing there.

“Shall I inject you with some more medicine? Doctor Kalonia prepared your dose for you.”

He nodded weakly, and she brought the hypospray to his upper arm before she injected it. He steeled himself against the sharp burst of pain that came with it, but almost immediately felt his power returning.

“Did you sleep alright?” she asked kindly, but he wasn’t used to someone fussing over him in the first minutes of morning.

“Yes,” he replied in a whisper, opening his eyes fully and looking around. “Is there a place where I can take a shower or something?” he wondered.

“Sure!” Rey replied. “You can use the one attached to my room. I’ll show you where.”

Ten minutes later he found himself underneath Rey’s sonic shower.

Thirty minutes later, he was still there, and he heard her knock on the door.

“Hux?” she asked. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine!” he replied, hoping she wouldn’t barge in while he was naked.

“Okay! Don’t stay in there too long, you need to do some exercises too before your medicine wears out!”

It had felt good though, and it was with regret that he stepped out of the shower and put on new clothes. They were looking the same as the ones he’d worn the day before, but they were clean and he was going to enjoy that small pleasure.

Entering Rey’s room, he found her sitting in a meditative pose, and he looked at her for a moment. She had good form and looked very relaxed as she invited him to sit on the mat opposite her.

While he sat down, she was smiling at him.

“Did you always take showers that long?”

He returned her smile. “Sometimes. When I could get away with it. It’s a great place to let inspiration flow and think things over.”

“What were you thinking about?” she asked curiously.

“My freedom,” he replied honestly. “And you.”

As he looked at her with a mysterious smile, Rey started blushing. She wasn’t even sure why, but she was holding her breath.

He chuckled because of her startled response.

“Probably not in the way you think,” he added, his tone amused.

Narrowing her eyes at him, Rey glared at him for a while. “How then?” she wanted to know.

“You tell me,” he replied mysteriously.

Uncertain what kind of mind game he was playing, Rey frowned.

“Unfortunately we have no time for games. You need to be doing exercises,” she said in a stricter tone, no longer as relaxed as a minute before. “Let’s start with some stretching exercises.”

Disappointed that she wouldn’t humor him, but aware that he needed his exercise, he followed her instructions and did as she did. Apparently she was impressed by how flexible he still was, and when their stretching exercises were over, they spent hours walking through the corridors.

Though she didn’t necessarily need to walk with him, she did. When he reminded her of that, she replied: “To be honest, I want to. There aren’t many other ways to get any exercise in here, and I’m not the kind that enjoys sitting still for too long.”

As they walked, he waited for a question from her that didn’t seem to come, and after they’d shared lunch (just some protein bars) and walked another hour or so, he felt that his muscles were growing weaker again and he was slowing down in his walks.

“Time to lay down?” she offered, and though he nodded, he also asked: “Could I stay in your room?”

Once again, she seemed shocked and she was blushing.

“Yours is nicer. Mine is just an old, abandoned operating room. Quite depressing, to be honest.”

She still hesitated.

“I wouldn’t mind the company either,” he added. “I can watch you as you meditate.”

She frowned again, and he realized that maybe she didn’t want him to watch her. Why would she?

Realizing what a creepy suggestion that had to have been to her, he shook his head.

“My apologies,” he said almost immediately. “I just… I despise boredom.”

Rey was still quiet, thinking it over. After a few moments, she nodded. “Let’s move your bed in there, and make sure your respiration mask is near. I would rather not have you suffocate on my watch.”

Glad that she’d allowed him in, he smiled and nodded.

“Don’t worry, I won’t.”

+++

By the time they’d moved everything into Rey’s room, Hux was panting and he had worked up a sweat. A little worried about his state, Rey helped him onto the bed. His body was trembling quite badly.

“Have I overexerted myself?” he asked, his voice a whisper again.

“I hope not,” she replied, not entirely certain of it. She covered him up with blankets, and he arranged them comfortably over his body while he still could.

“Do you want your respiration mask?” she offered, but he shook his head.

“Not yet,” he replied. “But soon. I think you have time to ask me one more question.”

Rey wondered why he worded it that way, but as she looked into his eyes, she realized that he _knew_.

“You want me to ask you why the code didn’t work,” she realized, and as she said it, she saw how his lips curled up into a pleased smile.

“Exactly,” he replied softly. “May I have the mask now?”

He closed his eyes as he lay there comfortably, while Rey was looking at him in confusion. Then it dawned on her.

“What?!” Her voice was louder again, not allowing him to relax just yet. “This entire morning and afternoon you’ve not mentioned it once and now that you want to sleep, you let me ask the question and then decide you won’t answer it?”

He opened his eyes again to look at her, a cocky smile on his face.

“Yes,” he whispered. “Do you think I ever would?”

Upset, Rey tried not to lose her cool.

“I’ve treated you with nothing but kindness all day – and then you pull a jerk move like that?”

“You have treated me with nothing but kindness,” he agreed softly. “But only because you want something. That was clear from the moment you woke me. If you didn’t want something, you’d be gone by now. So who’s the jerk now?”

Rey furiously opened and closed her mouth a few times, not sure how to reply or insult him.

“I could easily enter your unconscious mind when you sleep and get the information from there!” she threatened him.

“Mmm, sure, yes,” he replied, sounding bored, even in his whispers. “Or maybe you’re just looking for another excuse to kiss me.”

Furious, Rey grabbed the respiration mask and put it on his face.

“Just shut up and sleep already,” she muttered, before she left the room and slammed the door behind her.

+++

Rey left the premises and headed to her ship. The Ghtroc 800 was a light freighter – one she could operate without a droid and one that comfortably was able to sustain her on her missions and travels throughout the galaxy.

She loved flying it through space, meditating, but for now she wasn’t taking off. Part of her wanted to leave. She didn’t want to face Hux again. Not because he’d been wrong – but perhaps because he’d been right.

Would she still spend any of her time on him if she wasn’t on a mission to get the code? Wasn’t she being nice to him so that he’d be nice to her and help her along as well? Maybe he’d been right. It was all terribly confusing.

She had a tiny meditation stool stored away in a locker, and took it out and placed it in the middle of the small aircraft. With her eyes closed, she tried to find the balance within herself and the Force, but she was unable to find her center, thinking of one extreme and then the other.

“Someone’s not having a great day,” a deep voice came from opposite her.

Opening her eyes, she saw Ben sitting casually in front of her, a mix between amusement and worry on his face.

“Are you all right?” he asked.

_He was looking good_, Rey thought to herself. Well-rested and cheerful, with color on his cheeks and mischief in his eyes.

“Could be worse,” she replied with a sigh.

“Are you still trying to get that code from Hux’s mind?”

She nodded.

“He’s infuriating, isn’t he?” Ben asked with a small smile. “I often tossed him to the other side of the room when he got too annoying, but I suppose you’re not in a situation where you can do that.”

Rey frowned at that disapprovingly. That sort of action had only strengthened Hux’s belief that no one could be trusted, and that no one would treat him kindly for no reason at all.

Then again, Ben had been in a similar position once. He hadn’t trusted his own family and turned his back to everyone, yet he’d returned to the light.

“Ben… What pushed you back to our side?”

He seemed surprised by the question, but didn’t need to think long about it.

“You,” he replied. “The idea that someone would help me and I wouldn’t be alone – it gave me something to fight for. But also the sacrifices of my father and Luke, and the direness of our situation after that… There were many reasons. But without you, I’m not certain any of them would have mattered much.”

Rey was quiet as she listened. She didn’t know how any of that translated to Hux.

“You talked to me and listened to me when no one else did,” he continued. “And I recognized myself in you. You were precisely what I needed, like a mirror. I suppose you made me feel loved when I’d forgotten what that was like. You came to save me from Snoke, and I’d never felt as empowered as I did in that moment.”

When he spoke like that, Rey sometimes forgot the ways in which they were uncongenial – and how fiercely different he would respond to her idea of taking in other Force-sensitives.

While Ben was of the belief that no child was waiting for that responsibility, and that no one wanted to be ripped from their home for an ideology that put the fate of the galaxy on their shoulders, Rey was of the belief that they could help the children with the development of their powers, and that they could ensure they ended up on the right path.

Ben felt like they would be destined to repeat the mistakes of Luke and the Jedi Order if they did just that, but Rey still felt like maybe there were lost people out there that would benefit from the companionship of a group of Jedi.

Maybe it didn’t matter who she saved. Maybe she just didn’t want to be alone anymore.

“Thank you,” she said, still lost in thought.

As he recognized her distracted mind, he felt the need to remind her: “Hux can’t be saved, but that’s okay. As long as you get the code, you can save others in his stead. The knowledge the code provides will be a goldmine for scientists of the New Republic.”

Rey nodded, but she wasn’t certain she fully agreed.

“See you around, Ben.”

He offered her another smile, and then he was gone.

Could she save Hux?

Unfortunately, there was no Snoke to save Hux from, and Rey feared that Hux would forever think her kindness only came from her desire to crack the code.

But she realized that it wasn’t true.

She didn’t want to crack the code, she wanted to crack him and bring him to the light. She still believed he had the potential, she just didn’t fully know how to go about it.

Maybe he wasn’t as unlike Ben as Ben would prefer to believe. Hux had asked to be in her room – surely that meant he didn’t want to be alone? Surely he liked her in some way? She had to try again.

+++

The door to her room opened quicker than he’d expected. He’d dozed off, but only for a small while, and had felt too weak to do anything. But he hadn’t had to wait for too long, and turned his head slightly so he could watch her enter.

Her anger was gone and from her gaze he could tell that she was all kindness again.

He’d won one battle, but not the war, he figured. She was ready for another round.

He often enjoyed battles like these, but if he was honest, he wasn’t particularly in the mood for fighting her.

“Rey,” he whispered through the respiration mask.

“Yes?” she asked sweetly.

“You don’t need to do this. You don’t need to stay with me in the hopes I’ll give you the code. I won’t.” He took a deep breath, a little lightheaded from saying so much in such a short amount of time.

While he was catching his breath, he felt how her fingertips were stroking through his hair. It was nice and almost relaxed him to the point where he felt he could fall asleep within a few heartbeats.

Willing himself to stay awake, he continued: “You probably have better things to do, and I don’t want to play you in this regard. You’re not getting the code, no matter what you say or do. No amount of kindness or cruelty will make me give it up.”

Her expression had hardly changed, and when she leaned in and kissed his forehead, he was terribly confused.

“Bold of you to assume that the code is what I want the most,” she whispered with a small smile on her face, but that only confused him more.

“What?”

He didn’t understand.

She stroked his hair again. “Sleep well, Armitage.”

She walked away and stepped into the bathroom. Had he been able to follow her, he would have. But in this case, he was powerless to pursue her for an explanation.

What was it that she wanted then?

Had she just given him a taste of his own medicine?

+++

The days that followed were rather confusing to Hux.

As he grew stronger, he still expected Rey to ask him for the code, but she never even mentioned it. He figured that it still had to be what she wanted though, she was just playing nice so he’d give it to her willingly. She was patient, but so was he. If she believed that would work, she was very naïve.

Even as the medicine had worked out for the day, he was able to sit up straight on the sofa of Rey’s guestroom. He no longer needed the respirator during the day – only at night. And so in the evenings, he just took it easy now.

A holovid was playing on the small table in front of them, of a famous opera from Coruscant. He’d always enjoyed listening to operas, but had done so too rarely.

While he’d listened in silence the past hour, he sighed sadly, and Rey picked up on it. Turning her head to him, she raised an eyebrow.

“Is the opera not to your liking?” she asked. If that was the case, she wondered why he hadn’t said so sooner.

“It is,” he quickly replied, not wanting her to get the idea that he didn’t appreciate the way in which she was lenient with him. “I was just thinking about how by this time next week, I’ll probably be in a cell, on a harsh, cold bench, forbidden from ever listening to anything like this again.”

Rey turned away fully from the holovid, and looked at him instead. They hadn’t talked about the future yet, and she had dodged the topic herself as well. It wasn’t making either of them happier thinking about Hux’s life in prison.

“Maybe I’ll be able to negotiate for some luxuries by giving up the code,” he told Rey softly. “That’s why I won’t give it to you.”

“I understand,” Rey said immediately, putting her hand on top of his. He really didn’t need to explain himself.

As Hux looked into her eyes, he realized that she did. Of course she did. It just didn’t make it clearer why she was so patient with him now. Why was she still nice to him if she knew she wasn’t going to gain anything directly from it?

“What will you ask for?” she asked.

“Some datapads with books or music would make the rest of my life pass a tiny bit quicker,” he replied immediately. “Do you know if the cells are large?”

Rey shook her head. She honestly had no idea.

As he looked down at the way her hand lay on top of his, she blushed. She wasn’t going to pull back though, and was surprised when he turned his hand so he could hold hers.

“I don’t suppose you’ll visit me?” he asked slowly.

Her heart broke a little at the question. He wasn’t a good man - yet. Sure, he behaved, but that didn’t mean that he felt remorse for anything he’d ever done, or that he would offer to help the Resistance without expecting something in return. He still hadn’t lived up to his potential, but she wondered if there was any hope for redemption if he got locked away in prison.

“I might,” she replied honestly. “But I will take no pleasure from it.”

Hux frowned. She usually wasn’t mean to him, and so this felt like a punch to the gut. He withdrew his hand from underneath hers and crossed his arms as he looked at the holovid again, even if he wasn’t really paying attention to the music now.

“If it’s against your wish to see me, then please don’t visit,” he said in a stricter tone, his voice clipped.

Rey sighed. She’d voiced it in a wrong way.

“That’s not what I meant,” she explained. “I meant that I won’t take pleasure from seeing you suffer. And I am not looking forward to seeing you in jail.”

Hux was shook. Could she really care that much?

“Aren’t you a little bit proud that you can turn me in to the Resistance, saying you are the one responsible for putting me in jail?” he asked.

She immediately shook her head. “Not at all. To be honest, I’d rather put you back into a coma.”

“Why?”

“Because prison won’t help you. You deserve a shot at redemption,” she said honestly. “And in prison, with a lifelong sentence, you won’t get that shot. And I doubt they’ll ever release you, no matter how well you behave.”

Hux feared the same, yet at the same time he was moved by her concern. As he looked at her, his eyes expressed nothing but gratitude and empathy, and he noticed her blush the moment she recognized his gaze.

He took hold of her hand again, and squeezed it gently.

“I’m still not certain why you’re choosing to spend this time with me, here,” he admitted.

She nearly turned crimson and averted her eyes.

With great effort, he moved closer to her on the sofa, noticing the way she gulped as she looked at him.

“You may stop me,” he whispered, leaning in closer to her, holding still when his nose was only an inch apart from hers.

She was holding her breath, but she wasn’t stopping him as the music played in the background.

His lips brushed as light as a feather against hers, and he waited for her to close the distance, but for a heartbeat or two that didn’t happen.

Then, the moment he wondered if he had to pull away from her, he felt her sweet lips press softly against his, and he closed his eyes fully as he savored the sensation.

He understood why people enjoyed having mates now – the simplest kiss was able to light a spark, and if he’d been in better shape, he would have loved to explore it to a full extent.

He would have gladly spent his entire evening kissing her, but she pulled away from him and then got up completely, turning her back to him.

“Rey,” he said softly. “Is this why you’re still here with me?”

As she turned to face him, it seemed from the confusion that she did not know what he meant.

“You have no reason to stay with me,” Hux replied. “You know the code will be leverage for me during my trial, and Doctor Kalonia could also take care of me if you were gone. Is this you, or your subconscious, asking for a dead man’s affection?”

Rey frowned, but didn’t look him in the eye. It seemed like she didn’t know either.

“Because,” Hux’s heart beat a little quicker as he continued: “If that’s what it is, it could benefit us both. If I’m about to spend eternity in a depressing cell, then I would not mind making some better memories with you. And if your Jedi ways forbid attachment, I’ll be your willing victim. And the attachment won’t last, for we both know our ways will separate very soon.”

As she looked at him, he spotted the tear in the corner of her eye. She was thinking about his words, and he feared for a moment she would leave the room.

“I can’t follow you yet if you leave the room,” he continued softly, imagining himself to be talking to a frightened animal rather than another human. He needed to be gentle if he was to succeed. “If you want this, I will give it to you. You saw my subconscious, you know I liked you too in this way. You’re not forcing me into anything I’m unwilling to give.”

He extended his hand to her, and as she looked at it, it only took her a moment before she put her hand in his. Slowly she sat down by his side again.

Hux’s heart was beating wilder than he’d expected it to himself. Part of him had feared it wouldn’t work, but so far so good, and now his body was hardly able to contain his excitement.

“The Jedi of old encouraged love,” she said softly, looking at the holovid instead of him. “But not for themselves. They didn’t kiss or love. They didn’t form attachments at all.”

“I’m sure some must have done so, in the shadows.”

Rey chuckled briefly. “Darth Vader did. But I have no desire to be like him. But at the same time, I have no desire to be like Luke, or Yoda, or any other Jedi I ever read about.”

“You can forge your own path,” Hux offered, hoping that path would lead her back to his lips.

“I can, but I fear it won’t be right to take advantage of your presence right now. What I want is not just a taste of the life I’m missing.”

“What is it that you want then?” Hux asked, his voice hardly more than a whisper as he looked at her, while she seemed adamant about not turning her gaze to his.

He noticed how she was sniffing now, tears streaming down her face as she didn’t look at him.

“A family,” she answered in a breathy whisper. “Someone who loves me unconditionally. Someone who chooses me.”

His heart ached for her.

“You grew up alone on Jakku, didn’t you?” he asked her, trying to understand her pain better. “Do you remember anyone loving you, in your childhood?”

She shook her head, still crying.

“Neither do I,” he realized. Not a single memory had been a loving one. He’d hardened his heart so he’d never have to feel like he missed out on something, but she hadn’t, not fully. She’d held out hope, while he’d snuffed it out.

But now, with her sitting next to him, it felt like a sliver of hope came back to life. Maybe he hadn’t given up completely after all.

“May I hold you?” he asked softly, and as Rey turned her head to him, he smiled. “Tonight? May I hold you the way you’d want to be held?”

It was a more innocent question than any Rey’d expected. She’d be lying if she pretended it wasn’t something she wanted.

“Yes,” she replied finally, offering him a small smile. “That would be nice.”

+++

Rey had locked the door before she’d laid down in bed besides Hux. The last thing she wanted was for Doctor Kalonia to barge in and find her like this, with her head resting against Hux’s chest and his arm around her shoulder.

They were fully clothed, but her hair was loose as she closed her eyes and tried to catch some sleep, his presence soothing her. The way she felt his chest rise and fall was calming, and she put her arm around his waist.

His body was thin, but warmer than she’d expected. Though he wasn’t wearing any sort of perfume, he smelled very nice, and Rey liked that about him.

When she fell asleep, she had no idea she’d wake only a few hours later, because his body was jerking a little underneath her, and as she rubbed through her eyes and turned on the night light, she noticed how he was still sleeping, but shaking his head a little and groaning.

He was having a nightmare.

She knew she could wake him up, but also considered following him in there, in his subconscious. After all, he needed to learn how to control those nightmares if he was to live without her soon. If she could give him peace of mind, it would be a small comfort to them both.

Focusing on his breathing and closing her eyes, she was able to follow him into his mind, and what she saw made her blood boil.

He was dreaming of his father again, but this time Armitage was hardly more than a toddler – getting yelled at because he apparently wasn’t progressing swiftly enough in school.

She wasn’t going to let it escalate, and with a swift movement of her lightsaber, she made Brendol Hux vanish.

Before she could turn to Hux, the environment shifted and they were on Crait, and Kylo was smacking him through the command room of an AT-ST.

She hesitated for a brief moment. After all, she was friends with Ben Solo – but Kylo Ren had not been as nice to him as he’d been to her. And this wasn’t really Ben – this was just a figment of Hux’s imagination.

As before, she swiftly terminated Hux’s enemy for him, closing her eyes as she did so. Once it was over, she immediately turned to him.

“Hux, it’s all good again, you’re safe now. You’re just having a nightmare.”

As she looked at his terrified expression, she saw it change into apprehension, but then his gaze turned from fearful to annoyed.

He was mad with her for being there.

The next moment, she was tossed out of his dream, and for once, she did not resist.

Waking up by his side, she sat up with a gasp.

He was waking too, and in the dim light of the room, she saw he wasn’t happy with her.

“Why were you in my mind?” he demanded to know – his voice deep with sleep as he rubbed his eyes.

“You had a nightmare,” she explained quickly. “I wanted to help.”

“You can’t just enter my mind uninvited!” he berated her.

“I can!” she replied stubbornly.

“Well you shouldn’t! You don’t have my permission!”

Annoyed that he wasn’t capable of gratitude for her assistance, she pursed her lips together and crossed her arms.

As he looked at her, he sighed and then tried to sit up straight as well. It took him a bit of effort to get up, and he looked at her for a long while.

“What were you doing in there?” he asked, his voice a little less harsh now.

“I was just trying to help,” she answered honestly, trying to let her own anger slide as well. Hux was right – it wasn’t proper to enter one’s mind without one’s permission, but she’d had good intent.

“I’ve had nightmares all my life,” Hux admitted. “But I can handle them. I always have.”

Rey frowned and shook her head. “They haven’t made you happier. They’ve made you bitter and cruel. I’m certain you can be a better man if there’s peace in your mind.”

He was moved by her concern, but also annoyed by her judgement of him.

“Tell me what purpose it would have to make me a better man if I’m going to be stuck in prison for the rest of my life,” he asked her. “Because I don’t see the point in trying.”

Rey was quiet. She didn’t know how to respond to that. She feared that maybe he was right.

Instead of arguing, she lay down again, and he followed her example, doing the same as he looked at her.

“I appreciate your concern,” he continued in a softer tone. “I really do. But it’s too late for me, Rey. You can’t save me. I’m a war criminal in the eyes of the Republic, and that’s all I’ll be for the rest of my life. There is no redemption waiting for me, and I’ll never become the good man you think I can be. You’re going to have to accept that.”

Stubborn as she was, she frowned and then turned her back on him, quite literally. She didn’t want to listen to him. He understood.

Resting his hands on his stomach, he closed his eyes and tried to catch some sleep again. It had been nicer when she’d put her head on his chest, when they’d fallen asleep touching one another, but this was the only path for the both of them. He had never deserved her affection in the first place.

+++

Though she never left his side, distance returned between them. He slept in his own bed the nights that followed, and their conversations were very casual.

They didn’t talk about Rey’s loneliness or Hux’s nightmares or about the unspoken attraction between them. They knew their time together was coming to an end, and believing anything else would be foolish.

As his last hour in the facility arrived, doctor Kalonia gave him a checkup. While it would take some time for him to build the muscles the way he’d once had them, he was able to walk again and sit up straight without any injections or outside medication. He was able to eat solid foods again and could take care of himself without outside help.

There were no things for Hux to pack, and he was wearing the white pants and shirt that everyone in the facility had worn. He didn’t agree with the outfit they were about to hand him over in, but didn’t fight the medical droid that put handcuffs on him. He didn’t even mention it, but it was clear from his expression that he didn’t like what was happening at all.

Even if he was to face his doom, he seemed willing to take the responsibility to do so.

No one knew they were on their way. Rey had discussed it with Doctor Kalonia. It was a risk informing General Leia before he was there. If others knew Hux was alive, the entire facility would be at risk, and it would be safer to inform the General once they were gone from the planet and on the move.

Rey thanked the doctor for her good care and wished her all the best, and as she escorted Hux outside, she warned him: “Take a deep breath before we leave the building – the outside atmosphere is very thin. If you exhale slowly, it won’t be long before we arrive at my ship.”

Hux was cold outside, but did as Rey had instructed him and breathed slowly. He looked up at the stars and felt terribly sad that this was it. These were his last moments as someone who was the tiniest bit ‘free’.

Rey usually didn’t feel strong emotions ebbing off Hux, but she felt his sadness as he entered her ship before her.

When he stood still in the small hold, Rey told him: “It’s alright, you can sit with me in the cockpit.”

He nodded and headed towards the cockpit, sitting down in the copilot’s seat with his cuffed hands in his lap. The ship was cold, and he clasped his hands together in order to get them a little warmer.

While Rey started preparing the ship for takeoff, she also went back to the hold and took a blanket from a cupboard. Back into the cockpit, she beckoned Hux to sit forward a little bit, and she wrapped it around him.

As she caught his gaze, she saw the saddest but most grateful expression she could have imagined to come from him, and her heart broke.

Turning away from him, she quickly wiped a tear from her eye as she sat down in the pilot’s seat and the ship departed.

+++

There was silence between them as the ship travelled through hyperspace and Hux wasn’t certain what to say. He wasn’t in the mood for light conversation, and the longer he sat by her side, the more he felt like a noose was tightened around his neck.

The past weeks he’d been able to ignore it or move it to the back of his mind, but it was becoming clearer than ever that he was going in for a lifelong punishment and that he would not make it out of whatever prison they’d put him in.

And if his punishment had already begun from the moment he’d woken up, then it had still been alright because he’d been with Rey. Her presence was soothing in a way that he’d sorely miss once they arrived and she handed him over.

As he gazed out at the stars, tears ran down his cheek. He was sad for himself, mostly, and not certain that he was ready for what was to come.

From the corner of her eye, Rey noticed his dreadful state. She’d picked it up in the Force as well, and made a mild course correction. No one knew they were coming yet, and so she wasn’t in a rush to get to General Organa.

When the ship dropped out of hyperspace, Hux quickly rubbed his cheeks with the back of his tied-up hands. He frowned as he gazed out of the cockpit window though. In front of them was a beautiful nebula, pink and purple colors swirling all around for as far as the eye could see.

Rey smiled at the sight, and without looking at him, she explained: “I first came here last year. It’s a beautiful place to meditate, don’t you agree?”

Turning towards him, she saw there were tears streaming down his cheek, and there was hardly a point in wiping them away for he was turning into a blubbering mess.

Alarmed, Rey got up and knelt down by his side, unlocking his handcuffs so he could wipe his cheeks more freely.

“Hux?” she whispered, and his lip trembled.

“I thought… For a moment… When you dropped out of hyperspace… That it was already time to say goodbye,” he explained miserably. “And then I realized… I don’t know if I can do this.”

Rey was a little shocked to find him in this state. He’d always seemed so self-assured and certain before. But now he seemed to be falling apart.

“Maybe you can put me in a coma again?” he asked, his voice pleading, though it was a demand Rey could not help him with.

“I can’t,” she replied softly, putting her hand on his. “Take deep breaths. You are so much stronger than this.”

He nodded as he took a few shaky breaths, trying to get over his panic attack, but it was hard.

“We aren’t going anywhere as long as you’re not feeling okay,” Rey promised him. “We’re not in a rush.”

Hux shook his head through his tears and gave her a dry half-smile. “I’ll never feel okay if that’s the case. You do realize that?”

She returned his smile. “I do. Maybe I don’t want to say goodbye just yet either.”

His heart ached terribly, and he started crying again, though he did not look away from Rey as he did so.

“Can’t I stay with you?” he asked miserably. “I can’t do anything that the Resistance would dislike if I’m with you.”

Rey gulped. Her heart wanted to allow him to stay, but her mind told her that no one in the Resistance was going to appreciate it if she played judge and jury and decided over his fate.

Yet at the same time, all she wanted for him was to find a way to redeem himself, and he’d never get the chance if she handed him over.

Turning away from him, she sat herself down in the pilot’s chair again and took a deep breath.

No matter what she wanted to do, there was always a part of her that felt wrong for doing it. There was no right call to make, and each option felt equally wrong, but she couldn’t just give up either.

She had a little fight still left inside.

+++

Hux had never had a panic attack quite as badly as that one, and through his tears he’d hardly been able to register what Rey had been doing.

She’d looked up some things in the computer, and then she’d taken them away from the nebula – even before he’d calmed down fully – and the ship had travelled a little while further through hyperspace.

But it hadn’t taken very long before they’d entered a new system and made their descent into the atmosphere of a green planet.

He had no idea which planet it was, or where they were going precisely. There didn’t seem to be any cities visible to the naked eye, and Hux wondered if they were going to a prison or other facility where former First Order officials were being held captive. Maybe it made sense that it wasn’t on some overpopulated planet, but on a rather deserted one that he would be turned in.

He tried to steel himself and closed his eyes, trying to focus on his breathing and to prepare himself for whatever was to come. He imagined facing someone like Snoke or Kylo Ren – someone that would abuse each shred of weakness he showed – and it helped him clear his mind of other emotions as he remembered how much he had hated Snoke and Kylo Ren. Hatred was a good way to calm himself down, and when he heard the landing gear shift, he opened his eyes again, willing his heart to be ice again.

They were landing in a forest near a lake, and as he looked for a sign of civilization, he saw none. Maybe the entrance to his new prison was hidden.

As Rey parked the ship in an open clearing, Hux took the handcuffs from the floor. Rey had trusted him not to abuse her good faith in him, and he hadn’t. As she turned around in her seat and faced him, he offered her the handcuffs, offering himself to her as her obedient prisoner.

Rey took them from him and smiled gently as she put them to the side again.

“You won’t need these,” she said softly. “Come.”

He frowned.

As she got up, he followed her, leaving the blanket in the co-pilot seat, but utterly confused that he didn’t need the handcuffs. Weren’t they going to think him a threat if he wasn’t cuffed?

Stepping out into the fresh air, the sunlight was warm on his skin. For the briefest moment he closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling. It would probably be the last time before he was locked up.

Rey was standing by his side, looking around in all directions, clearly scouting the terrain.

“What are you looking for?” Hux asked. “Is it an underground base?”

As she turned to him, she was smiling.

“No, nothing of the sort. I’m not turning you in.”

Surprised, Hux’s mouth dropped slightly. “What?”

“You’re staying here. It’s an uninhabited planet, without any valuable resources, but with good water and air, and no predators bigger than you.”

He still couldn’t believe it. “What?”

She walked closer to him and took his hands, looking into his eyes.

“I’m not turning you over to live the rest of your life in a cell, where you’ll probably get assassinated in your sleep for the crimes you have committed against the free galaxy. Do you have survival skills?”

He nodded weakly, still a little dazed from this news. “Yes,” he replied briefly, glancing at her ship for a few moments. “But… will you leave me here without anything? I would appreciate some tools.”

“Don’t worry, silly, I’m not here to drop you off and be on my way. I’m here to help. And I’ll check in on you regularly. I’m not going to leave you here to die.”

He had no idea how she was going to break that news to Leia, but he knew that it was not a decision she’d made lightly. It put her at risk too, and it would save him from humiliation and torture or worse.

In an instant, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and embraced her tightly, and when she wrapped her arms around him as well, he closed his eyes in gratitude.

“Thank you so much, Rey. I don’t think anyone’s ever cared as much about me as you do.”

Rey pulled back from him slightly, just to look at him.

“I hope that you too will be able to care for someone in return, once you feel safe enough.”

A little confused that she would voice it that way, he nodded. But maybe she was right. Though there was an unfamiliar, warm feeling in his gut that he felt whenever he saw her, he knew it wasn’t love. But maybe some day, it could be. He was being given a new chance at life, and this time he could make it his and his alone. And maybe also hers.

+++

Rey had been with him for the first three days, scouting the area with him until he’d found a place where he wanted to live. Once he’d decided on a spot near a small lake, near a cliff, they’d begun setting up camp for him close to the bottom of the cliff. He was protected from the worst winds down there, and in the side of the cliff there was a cave which he could use for extra storage or shelter from the elements.

He had no intention of living in the cold cliff though, and with Rey’s help, he made a tiny wooden hut. Inside, they had placed an escape pod so he could secure his most valuable belongings safely, or take shelter in it himself. Rey had given him everything she could spare from her ship, but there were still many things that they figured would be good to have, but that they didn’t have at that moment.

When Rey was about to leave, Hux was feeling a little afraid.

Part of him feared that she would never return – but when she kissed him on the cheek and promised him she’d be back, he believed her.

She was gone for a day or two, and when she returned, she had brought dozens of metal panels so they could reinforce Hux’s home, as well as a lot of tools, provisions and seeds.

Though Rey had no intention of dying, she wanted Hux to be able to provide for himself in case she’d ever be unable to return to him.

Glad with all the items she was spoiling him with, he wondered how Leia had responded to the fact she’d not turned him in.

“She doesn’t know,” Rey admitted. “Not yet. She never even knew you were coming. Only Doctor Kalonia knows you’re awake.”

She didn’t stay long, her mind distracted as she helped him out with settling in and planting seeds, and she was gone before darkness fell.

When she returned two days later, she looked exhausted, and as they sat on some tree stumps in front of Hux’s little home, he offered her a cup of tea, which she gratefully took.

Worried about her state of mind, he gave her the time she needed to talk, and eventually she did.

“I went back to Doctor Kalonia,” Rey admitted, shaking a little.

Hux’s eyes grew wide.

“Did you…” He gulped. “Did you kill her?”

Rey raised an eyebrow.

“No, of course not!” she replied immediately, surprised he would think her capable of such a crime. “Though I’m not proud of what I did.”

“Then what did you do?” He was curious to know.

“I made her belief you had died, and adjusted her records to reflect it. It wasn’t easy, but I figured it would be the only way to keep you safe.”

Hux gulped.

“Does Leia know this… this lie?”

“Not yet,” Rey replied. “I’ll need to tell her, but…” She looked up at him with a pleading gaze. “I will only ask this one more time, Hux. The code.” She seemed miserable at the thought he wouldn’t give it to her. “If I can say I got the code, then perhaps they’d be satisfied with that particular ending to your story. I can say that I made a mistake – that I miscalculated and messed up your brain – but that I got the code before you passed away.”

Hux was quiet as he considered it. The code was the only thing he had to exchange for a better life, if the Resistance ever found him. If he gave it up, and they’d capture him, he would not be able to bargain.

But Rey had gone through all this trouble to keep him safe, and he trusted her.

His first instinct was to be selfish and to think of himself, but his second instinct was to show her respect and appreciation for what she’d done for him, and so he gave in.

He really trusted her not to betray him, and so he nodded briefly.

“The code I gave you was correct all along,” Hux admitted. “But it could only be opened through a specific vessel – one that has an encrypted layer of coding that was compatible with it.”

Rey’s mouth dropped a little. They had never even considered that.

“What vessel?”

Hux smiled. “A BB-unit – though not one of the Resistance, but one that has been reset by the First Order.”

Rey stared at him.

“So if we give the code to a BB-unit, it can unlock the program?”

Hux shook his head. “No, you install the program in the BB-unit, and when you need to give the BB-unit the code to open it, it will simply work. The BB-unit can then display all necessary information on whatever panel you need to see it on. And then afterwards you can erase the BB-unit again so no one will even know it was ever there. And there’s no trace of the contents in the panel itself.”

Rey blinked as she considered that. “That’s genius.”

Hux tapped the side of his head proudly. “My idea.”

Rey smiled, though she still looked a little sad, and Hux tilted his head.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “You’re risking a lot, covering for me.”

“I know. I’m not entirely comfortable with it,” she admitted. “But I won’t betray you either. I might not be back very soon when I leave again, but I promise I will be back when the coast is clear.”

Hux smiled gently. He believed her.

Reaching out his hand to her, she took it, holding it for a while as they smiled at one another.

“I trust you,” he admitted. “Good luck.”

+++

It took her three full weeks to return. The first week, he was quite all right. The second week, he was convinced she would never return, and he felt anxious during the day, and even worse at night, crying himself to sleep, missing her. By the third week, he told himself that maybe he would need to get used to the idea that she would spend very little time with him, if any at all.

When he heard her ship approach as he’d been fishing, he rushed to the spot where she always landed, and when she came down the ramp, she ran towards him. Without even knowing what he was doing, he was smiling and opening his arms, and she gave him the best hug he’d ever had. He didn’t let go of her for many minutes, enjoying the scent and warmth of her with his eyes closed.

“I was afraid you wouldn’t come anymore!” he admitted honestly, and as she sweetly touched his cheek at those words, he looked at her sadly. 

“Oh, Hux,” she replied miserably. “It were a tough few weeks, and I was given a mission that I feared would take much longer even! For a moment I feared it would be months before I’d make it back to you, but luckily Ben helped out and I was able to leave much sooner than anticipated.”

At the mention of the name ‘Ben’, Hux had frowned. He knew which Ben she was talking about, and part of him was jealous that he got to live a life with the rest of them while he was hiding on an uninhabited planet.

Rey sensed his jealousy before he’d worded any of it. She knew he’d probably never like Ben Solo, and from what she’d seen in his subconscious, she also understood why.

Standing on her toes, she pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, and as he looked at her in surprise, she admitted: “I missed you. I’m glad to be back now, and I’ve told them I was taking some time off for myself. They’ll only call upon me in very dire circumstances, and they have no way to track me.”

Hux bit his lip. “They might if they figure out the hyperspace tracking technology we developed. Did they use the code to get to all the information?”

Rey nodded. “Yes, they were happy to finally have access to the database. They were ecstatic.”

“How did they take the news of my death?”

She hesitated. “I only told Leia. She bought it and offered to talk to me about it. I said then that it was all right, but that I’d take some time off the moment I could, and she allowed it. Then we tracked some bounty hunters through space, took them out, though Ben did most of the work, and now I’m here.”

She took a deep breath as she closed her eyes and enjoyed the fresh air around her.

“I’m not going anywhere for a while,” she sighed happily.

That did cheer him up. “Good,” he said with a smile. “Because I have a few things I want to show you.”

+++

Hux showed Rey around his domain. He showed her where he liked to fish, where he’d been chopping wood, as well as the little path that ran from his house to the lake, with plants growing on either side. Some were flourishing, others weren’t thriving as much, but Rey assured him that she’d help with that.

Inside his house was the biggest surprise. Not only was Rey surprised to see two wooden stools that Hux had made himself. (Carpentry wasn’t his forte, judging on the result, though they seemed sturdy enough to sit on.) More surprising was the fact that a pet was sitting on top of one of the stools, a hairy, ginger creature that looked at Rey rather disdainfully as she stood in the door opening.

“Rey, meet Millicent, Millicent, this is Rey!”

As Hux held out his hand to the furry creature, it stroked its head against it, a purring noise escaping from its belly. Rey smiled because of it, but kept her distance.

“What is it?”

“Some sort of cat,” Hux said. “One of those predators you told me about. I was able to seduce her with some fish. After feeding her every day, she came to hang out around my hut, and when it was raining one night, she came inside and she hasn’t left much since then.”

“She’s beautiful,” Rey remarked, looking at her, and Hux agreed.

“And very soft, though she doesn’t like to be petted for too long. Usually just a minute or so before she gets bored.”

He’d hardly said it, or Millicent suddenly jumped down the chair and elegantly moved towards the door, not looking back as she walked past Rey and slipped outside.

“She’ll be back,” Hux said with a smile. “What do you think of my chairs?”

Rey’s eyebrows raised up as she tried to figure out the best way to reply to that, and Hux laughed.

“That bad, huh?”

He seemed to be in great spirits as he sat down on the bed Rey had brought along with her during her first trip for supplies. She sat down next to him and smiled warmly.

“I’m not a great liar,” she admitted. “May I instead compliment you on how well you look? You’ve got so much more color than when I left. You seem happier.”

He chuckled. “I _am_ happier. This is not a bad life, though I have to admit that I was terribly down for a while. The second week you were gone, I was very emotional – afraid I’d never see you again.”

“Oh, Hux,” she sighed. “I told you I’d be back. I promised.”

“I know,” he said softly, taking her hand. “I’m sorry for doubting you. I was just… afraid.”

Hoping to ease his mind, she moved closer to him to give him a kiss on his cheek, but when he turned his head to face her, she decided that his lips would be even nicer to kiss.

Maybe it was that fear of never seeing her again that inspired his boldness, and he pressed his lips firmly against hers.

The kiss lasted longer than their previous one, and when their lips broke apart, neither one of them moved away. Better yet, Rey turned to him completely and straddled him where he sat before she kissed him again, and he was her willing partner through all of it.

With his arms wrapped around her back, they embraced each other for a long while, enjoying the taste of the other and not worrying about anything at all. He was free, no one even suspected him to be alive, and she wasn’t in any trouble for the way they believed her to have killed him. They had time to themselves, and if Hux was going to explore his sexuality with anyone, then it was going to be with her. He trusted her completely.

They didn’t make it much further than kissing though. They didn’t really need to, for they both enjoyed it very much, and when Rey’s stomach started growling, Hux joked: “Can’t the Force help with that?”

“Haven’t eaten in a day,” she admitted, and he chuckled.

“Allow me to cook for you?”

“Is your cooking better than your carpentry?”

“Are you brave enough to find out?”

+++

The relationship between them was a bit unconventional, Rey figured. For days, they switched from banter to kissing, to sleeping in each other’s arms, to talking about the mysteries of the universe or to discussing the latest technological innovations.

Though Rey had a ship at her disposal, Hux never asked to leave the planet. He knew well that this was where he was safe, and that in space, they were more likely to run into trouble. He’d accepted his place and made peace with his new home, and enjoyed her presence above all things. He didn’t ask her to leave for more resources, and made do with what they had, and they enjoyed working in the gardens, gathering wood for the campfire and sitting by its warm light in the evening, gazing out at the stars.

They could see the nebula not too far from them. Though it was lightyears away, it colored the night sky in a hue of purple and pink on clear nights and it was a mesmerizing sight to look at.

After an evening of talking and laughing and pointing out shapes in the stars and such, trying to come up with their own constellations, Rey asked: “Are you happy here, Hux?”

He was quiet for a few moments.

“Yes,” he replied honestly. “Happier than I’ve ever been.”

Rey smiled proudly because of it and looked into the sky again.

“And you?” he asked kindly. “Are you happy?”

She looked at him and nodded slowly, a hint of sadness in her eyes.

“You’re not fully convincing me yet,” he said playfully, hoping she’d tell him why she was sad at the same time.

“I like kissing you,” she admitted, and he smiled because of it.

“I like kissing you too,” he replied honestly, and he saw how she gulped.

“I’m just afraid…” She wasn’t certain how to continue.

“Afraid of what?”

“Afraid it’s just physical. I don’t know. I want it to be more. But how am I supposed to know it’s more, I’ve never had more.”

Hux’s heart ached. He’d felt something similar.

“I know that feeling,” he said gently. “The feeling that there’s something in the pit of your stomach, or in your heart, but how are you supposed to know it when it’s new. Who’s going to tell you what it is.”

“What do you think it is?” she asked softly.

He smiled. “I think it might be love,” he answered truthfully, looking deeply into her eyes. “I think I love you, even if I’m not entirely certain what that’s like.”

Rey’s heart fluttered at those words, and she leaned in to kiss his lips. When they broke their kiss, she whispered: “I think I love you too.”

Pleased with that answer, he scooped her up and moved her to his lap. He wanted to celebrate that news with more kisses, and as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pressed her lips to his, he knew that she did as well.

+++

Hux was a very different person when his days weren’t filled with fear at all. Rey learned that he could be kind and funny and that he smiled more than she did.

The way he treated Millicent was another sign to Rey that she had made the right decision when she’d given him this shot at a new life. He was attentive to his pet’s needs and expected nothing in return. The same could be said for herself.

He held her tightly at night, but never made a move that would leave her uncomfortable.

After months of kisses and hugs and whispered compliments and declarations of affection, she was finally ready for more.

She did love him – and she knew he loved her – and one rainy morning where they decided not to get up just yet, she moved to sit on top of him and undressed herself.

He almost would have believed he was still dreaming, was it not for her hands-on approach, not leaving it to the imagination what she wanted from him.

For once, he was the obedient subject as she sought her own pleasure and brought him to the brink of his own, several times in a row.

He was convinced she was using the Force to sense when he was close, but was grateful that he at least got to see her come undone a few times before she allowed him the same.

Naked and a little sweaty, they lay entangled under the sheets, listening to the rain as it fell on the metal roofing that kept them dry and secure in their little home. They didn’t speak, but nothing needed to be said as they lay so close to one another. Every emotion and feeling was clear from the air around them, and Hux placed a few sweet kisses on the top of her head while she leaned her head against his shoulder.

She knew she’d always have someone to come home to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more (tiny) epilogue to follow! Hope you've enjoyed it so far! Let me know what you thought in a comment, and thanks for sticking around!
> 
> There's more Reyux coming to my AO3 very soon. Another shorter fic (like this one), which is already done and at the beta now will be published late-november, for Thanksgiving! Keep an eye on it - I have yet to pick a title for it, but the working title is "Tiny House AU" and it's a modern AU for Reyux.


	3. Chapter 3

“Look over there! Her ship! And there! That shelter! That must be where she lives!”

Ben pointed it out to his mother as they flew towards a clearing near the lake.

“Keep your hands on the console, Ben, I don’t want to crash down in your excitement. And try to stay calm, we’re not here to pick a fight with Rey.”

The Jedi grunted and frowned, landing the ship carefully so he’d be saved from further criticisms of his mother.

Though they weren’t proud of it, they’d placed a tracker aboard Rey’s vessel the last time she’d visited them. She’d become more isolated and secretive over the years, and had often closed herself off to the Force, often for many months in a row. She no longer gave her full attention to Ben, and he missed the friendship they’d once shared. As years had gone by, they’d grown apart, and part of him feared she was vulnerable to the Dark Side in her isolation.

Leia had noticed the same. Sometimes they’d needed Rey and she’d ignored their messages. Afterwards, she often made excuses that she’d been in the Outer Regions, searching Jedi artefacts, but there were never any artefacts to show, or any exciting stories to share.

As they walked down the ramp, Rey was already waiting for them, the frustration and feelings of betrayal clear from her face. She had her lightsaber in hand, the clearest sign possible that she was not willing to entertain them or receive them. It wasn’t lit – yet – and General Leia raised her hands as she walked towards Rey.

“We come in peace,” she said, her voice half-serious, half-joking, and Rey had her lips pursed together.

Her eyes were angry as she gazed at Ben, and for a moment he felt as when they’d just met and she’d been angry with him on so many occasions – for good reasons.

“I knew you weren’t looking for artefacts,” Ben said, the betrayal in his tone clear as well. “Why are you isolating yourself this way? Why are you cutting yourself off from the Force so much?”

“Leave,” she said to the both of them, with no intent to explain anything. She ignited her lightsaber, but neither Ben nor Leia took a step backwards, though they did gaze at one another for the briefest moment.

“Rey…” Ben’s voice was trembling now. “Don’t go this way…”

_Don’t go dark_, is what Rey imagined him to say, and she bit back tears in frustration.

“I’m not dark, if that’s what you’re worried about,” she replied. “But you aren’t welcome here.”

“Yes, leave!” came a small voice from behind Rey, and both visitors spotted how Rey froze completely and turned quite red in the face.

As Leia’s mouth dropped at the sound of a little boy’s voice, she looked over Rey’s shoulder to see a young boy stand by a tree, carrying Rey’s old staff in a way that betrayed the child’s master was standing before him – or rather…

“You’re his mother?” Leia asked, moved and confused by this revelation. This wasn’t what she’d expected. But the kid looked so much like Rey – the hair color, the freckles, even the way he held himself as he carried her old weapon. He had to be about eight years old, and was stealing curious glimpses of the strangers – and the beautiful ship behind them.

“Yes,” Rey admitted, trying not to cry. “Now, please, leave.”

She was pleading now, and though Leia wanted to retreat – for now – Ben had finally come over the initial shock.

“Who’s the father?” he demanded to know, his tone not particularly understanding, but still very hurt. “Why didn’t you tell us? Even if you wanted a family, do you really think we would have stopped you?”

“Ben,” Rey shook her head, not sure where to begin explaining without betraying the one person she was trying to protect.

But he would not hear it. “Did you think I could not handle it? Did you keep it a secret because you feared I would go dark again if I’d heard you had moved on? Did you really think that little of me? We could have helped! You didn’t need to do this alone!”

“Ben, no, that’s not it,” she replied, tears in her eyes. “That’s not it at all. It has nothing to do with you.”

She wasn’t certain if saying that calmed him down at all, for he seemed to be fuming.

The little boy had come out of his hiding spot and was now approaching his mother, whose shoulders were shaking.

“I demand you to leave my mama alone!” the boy said as he glared at Ben, his staff held out defensively as he lifted his chin proudly and bravely tried to protect his mother.

“Taron,” Rey said softly, wiping a tear from her face with the back of her hand. “It’s all right, go back to the house.”

But Taron was a loyal child, and he was staring into the tall, dark man’s eyes, unafraid. He was going to stand his ground.

Ben looked at the child, a shiver of recognition going through him at the tone the child had spoken with. The child did not sound like Rey, but still sounded familiar. But it were the eyes that weren’t like Rey’s at all, and sold him the truth.

Ben felt a shiver run down his back as he whispered: “You see the same eyes in different people.”

Rey gulped and as Ben looked at her in anger, she realized that he _knew_.

Turning his gaze away from hers, he suddenly walked past Rey and her son, towards the house that lay behind the trees.

Upset he would disrespect her request to leave, Rey used the Force to pull down two trees onto the path towards the house, blocking him from continuing. The sound the trees made as their roots were taken from the forest left all birds to fly away in fear and the entire forest turned quiet.

“Don’t you dare, Ben Solo!” Rey warned him angrily. “I don’t wish to fight you, but if you don’t respect my wishes, I _will_ fight you, and I _will_ win!”

Ben turned around and lit his lightsaber – as blue as hers these days.

“You’ve literally been sleeping with the enemy, so don’t think you hold the moral high ground here.”

“Taron, go to your dad,” Rey said in a tone so strict, that Taron immediately ran off this time.

“Ben, don’t fight,” Leia urged her son, but he would not hear it.

Rey ignored Leia as well, and storm clouds were gathering nearby, lightning striking over the distant hills as they were ready to face off.

+++

By the time Hux arrived, he wasn’t certain how long Ben and Rey had been fighting, but he was completely out of breath. Taron had told him who he’d seen, and if Hux knew anything about the Solo-Organa household, it was that they were the most stubborn people in the galaxy, and they would never leave because Rey asked it. Nor would they feel threatened by Rey.

Not willing to risk her life over this, he rushed towards the scene, his youngest in his arms while Taron followed close behind him with his five-year-old sister Irya in hand.

As he saw both Rey and the man he’d once known as Kylo Ren go at it, not holding back at all as their lightsabers clashed, he called out: “Stop! Please stop! I surrender!”

This grabbed their attention, and they stopped mid-battle.

“Armitage, no!” Rey cried out.

Ben seemed baffled to see Hux stand there – a little older with a streak of gray in his hair – his clothes casual, with a little ginger baby in his arms and a ginger girl by his side.

Leia approached him, much closer to him than Rey and Ben were, and Ben shouted out: “Mom, don’t go near him!”

Hux rolled his eyes as he looked at Leia. “Sure, let me pull a gun from my child’s wrap and shoot you where you stand, like I can take on Kylo Ren when I’m done with you,” he muttered ironically.

Even Leia offered him a half-smile as Ben ran closer, followed by Rey.

“Armitage, why?” Rey asked, her voice emotional and not understanding why he hadn’t remained hidden as instructed.

Hux smiled bravely, though his voice was tight as he fought back emotions.

“I didn’t want to lose you,” he admitted sadly, but somehow the baby had picked up on that for he began to cry.

Rey put her lightsaber away immediately and walked over to take the child from his arms.

“He’s hungry,” she said immediately, looking at their guests and feeling more awkward than ever. “You must have questions, but I must take care of him.”

Leia looked at the small child and nodded.

“Of course. May I join you?”

Not expecting that question, but not minding Leia’s presence, Rey nodded. Maybe it was as good a time as any to start explaining.

As Rey and Leia left, Hux was shielded by his oldest children while Kylo Ren stood opposite him. He knew that without their presence, chances were high he would have been killed on the spot.

“Do you… drink tea?” Hux asked, realizing that in all those years they’d spent together in the First Order, he hadn’t even learned what Kylo liked to drink.

The dark man was quiet for a few moments, glaring at Hux, then at his kids, before he begrudgingly replied: “Yes.”

+++

Rey was honest as she explained why she’d spared Hux, first to Leia, then to Ben.

Leia understood, and Ben, though he frowned throughout the entire story, did as well. At least now he understood why Rey had closed herself off from the Force and why they sometimes hadn’t spoken for months in a row – she had tried to protect her children. If anyone learned about this family, her children would be prosecuted as well by those looking for vengeance, and that was the last thing he wished upon them.

“The Galaxy would not welcome you back, Hux,” Leia said honestly. “But the Galaxy does not need to know.”

Ben’s arms were crossed stubbornly as he let his mom do the talking and looked around the living area. It was a basic home – way beneath the luxury he would have imagined Hux to prefer to live in – but at least it felt like a home, with a dining table for all of them, and even several kitchen cabinets that were beautifully handcrafted, though some of the stools that now held pots of herbs looked abysmal.

Watching Rey look at Hux, and Hux look at her, he saw nothing but worry and love between them, and his own heart ached because of it.

Over a decade ago, Rey had offered him a chance to live with her, to be with her, to make a future together away from it all. He could have had a life like this one.

But he’d felt responsible for the state of the Galaxy, and he’d wanted to make up for it. He hadn’t wanted to populate the galaxy with even more Skywalkers. He hadn’t wanted to repeat the mistakes of his parents, and he realized that Hux had not had that fear, or if he had, he had overcome it. He couldn’t help but wonder that if he’d made the plunge too, he could have overcome it as well.

Hux had not repeated the mistakes of his own father. His children seemed to love him, sitting close to him, his five-year-old even sitting on his lap while he’d spoken to Leia, so much softer and gentler than he could remember. The girl had her ginger hair in buns, much like Rey used to have it, but was dreamy and sweet – not much like either parent, if he was honest.

“You won’t take my father away, will you?” Taron asked, still the direct one as he stood next to Ben, and as Ben looked at the child, he felt put on the spot.

He shook his head.

“I won’t,” Ben said solemnly, glaring at Hux as he added: “Even if you used to be my worst nightmare.”

Hux raised his eyebrows, a little surprised. “Oh, trust me, the feeling was mutual.”

“Speaking as someone who literally saw his subconscious when he was in a coma, I can testify that is true,” Rey added with a smile, and as Ben raised his eyebrows curiously, wondering what she’d seen exactly, she chuckled.

Ben’s lips curled into something that almost seemed like a smile, and he shook his head.

“I had never expected you to change, but you have,” he admitted as he spoke to Hux.

Hux agreed. “I guess she changed us both – but only for the better.”

Ben sighed. “I guess I underestimated Rey’s power to see the good in other people and bring it out.”

Hux looked at Rey affectionately at those words, and as he reached out his hand and she took it, they both smiled.

“She took my anger and fear and pain, and replaced it with love,” he admitted, smiling.

“And all I had to give up was my loneliness,” Rey added.

Taron gagged. “Gross!”

They all laughed.

Though there was still a lot to be said to their visitors, and a lot of history to smooth out, it was a relief that it no longer was an arrest, but just a house call from old acquaintances, soon to be friends, for the first time, and again.

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your lovely comments on the story so far! Hope you've enjoyed this fic! I certainly loved writing it!!! 
> 
> I've begun uploading a new one. (It's finished in my drafts, so you don't need to fear it will end up a WIP forever)  
It's called "A New Life" - and I call it my Reyux "Tiny House Modern AU" - but that would be a dreadful title. XD It's also published as part of the Reyuxmas event - which means that the following weeks, more Reyux stories will pop up from various writers! If you wish to join the event, let me know. It comes from the Reyux discord, which is probably the best online discord which a small ship can have! If you want to join it, let me know! I can score you an invite!
> 
> Have a great day, and hopefully I'll see you in one of my other Reyux stories soon!


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